Avenger Experiment
by Wayward-Assbutt
Summary: The Avengers come together again two months after Loki's attack on New York, this time to spend some time in Malibu. Love, hilarity, angst and friendship ensues!
1. Starters

**This is a team building set of One Shots that take place two months after the movie. Lets just say the Avengers eventually trickled back together. I suppose they will be joined, and it'll range from angst to friendship to even romance (NO SLASH) the title of each chapter gives the general feel of the chapter.**

The very expensive private _Stark Industries _jet landed on the smooth Malibu runway at exactly four o'clock, just as scheduled. The big busted and flirty flight attendants waved goodbye to the group of super heroes, some even daring to blow kisses.

"How I missed you Malibu," Tony sighed as he flicked down his shades and began towards the pair of expensive looking cars that waited on the tarmac. One was a sleek and fast looking Audi R8, a car that screamed Tony Stark.

"And Malibu's missed you, Boss," a man in a suit stepped forward from where he had been loading luggage into a more practical car "I figured you would prefer the Audi,"

"You know me to well, Happy," they shook hands like old friends "people, meet Happy Hogan, Happy, meet the people,"

The driver smiled at them and offered his hand. After a quick meet and great Tony frowned slightly.

"That car only seats four, Happy," Tony went over to his precious Audi.

"I know sir, but on short notice it was the best I could get," Happy said.

"What's the big deal? Someone will just have to ride with you," Clint crossed his arms over his broad ches.t

"I would prefer my car to be free of piss stains," Tony climbed into the drivers seat "Bruce, with me,"

"Tony drives fast," Natasha reiterated for the newly returned Thor who nodded briefly in understanding.

While the other Avengers clambered into the expensive car Bruce buckled down in Tony's car. Sure he had driven with Tony before, in New York, where traffic was so bad his prized sports car couldn't show its true potential, but now on the roads of Malibu, it seemed Tony was having the time of his life with the roof down and _Black Sabbath_ roaring from the speakers.

"Don't you think you should slow down?" Bruce asked as they skidded around a corner.

"What?" Tony asked as he leaned in a little closer, eyes straying off the road.

"Eyes on the road!" Tony chuckled before shifting back to his normal position with a roll of his eyes. They flew smoothly around a corner, the Malibu beaches spreading out next to them. It seemed they where getting a little more out of the way of Malibu life because the large excessive masnions became less common.

Soon enough though they rolled up to a large gate. The wrought iron gate slid open smoothly at their arrival, the other car was close behind them. Bruce couldn't help but smile slightly as he saw the mansion and it's grounds. After bunking in _Stark Towers_ he supposed he shouldn't have expected less from Tony's personal home. The grass was neat and perfectly cut, stopping short of the expansive cliff. At the end of the road leading up to the mansion was a water fountain that lead to a turning point for cars. The mansion itself was large, modern and very airy looking with all it's glass.

"You're out of practice," Tony chuckled as he bounded out of the Audi towards Happy "I need to get you back into shape!"

"I didn't want to alarm the others, Boss," Happy smiled good heartedly as he began unloading the luggage.

"Two master assassins, a God and a war hero? I don't think fast driving would scar them that much," Tony clapped his hands as he looked at everyone in front of him "Basic rules. No one can go in the garage, no one can touch my cars, no one can go in my room, you can't break anything, and you're not allowed to crawl in the air vents," he glared at Clint who just gave a half hearted shrug.

Tony bounded up the steps and called over his shoulder at his driver "take the Audi down to the garage for me?"

"Sure thing, Boss,"

Punching in a short digit code the Avengers stepped into the airy and light interior of Tony's home. The different members noticed different things.

Natasha noticed that the workers had done a good job repairing the place after Tony's party. It looked like the place had never been smashed through. Though some of the furniture looked newer and the TV's had been replaced, it looked the same as it had before.

Clint took stock of the large open areas, contrasted by the sharp furniture and glass. Everything in the room looked expensive, even the fake orchids that rested on one the tables. Always a spy though he noticed the easy to access air vents and extremely flimsy looking windows.

Bruce noticed that unlike the newly built Stark Towers, it was a bit more personalised. Though it contained no personal items, it just seemed to scream Tony Stark. It also helped his point that Tony had gone to make himself at home, shedding his tie, jacket and expensive sunglasses.

Steve, unlike Bruce, thought it wasn't very personal at all. He could see no photos of any family of any sort, none of Howard or even of Pepper. No knick knacks (not initially unexpected) could be seen. Everything was too modern, sleek and cold.

Thor was more interested in the whole scope of things. It was nothing like Asgard, and yet he knew by Misgardian standards this was the best place to live. He couldn't see a feasting table or anything of the sort.

"Welcome home, Sir," Jarvis spoke around the room "the guest bedrooms have been set up just as requested, and a reservation has been made at _Danza Fiore," _

"Dancing flower?" Natasha asked confused.

"This great Italian place," Tony said as he moved into the kitchen and lent against the bench "the other guy likes Italian, right? Because this place isn't green proof, and it's already been destroyed once,"

"You're the one who destroyed it," Natasha commented.

"I was drunk, what do you expect?" Tony said with a roll of his eyes "you can show them around right? I need to go check on my babies,"

"I did not know the Man of Iron was a father," Thor's brow crinkled.

Bruce shook his head with a slight chuckle "Tony isn't a father, he calls his toys his babies,"

Thors brow crinkled further but luckily Natasha saved the day, stopping further questions from the socially deprived god of thunder.

"I don't know why we agreed to doing this," she rolled her eyes before saying "come on, I'll give you a tour,"

The house contained everything a mansion was expected to, a gym, boxing ring, pool, sauna, and numerous other activity rooms. Tony eventually re-joined the tour and added his own commentary here and there.

"How are your babies?" Clint asked.

"They won't shut up," Tony rolled his eyes "now chop chop, get dressed, we have a reservation to make,"

"It's only four thirty," Steve pointed out as he looked at the billionaire.

"Pre dinner drinks," Tony stated it like it was obvious "and you better wear something nice, because I am not being seen with a man who dresses like a senior citizen."

Irked at the comment Steve went to his room, while the other followed suit. Tony dressed in a deep dark grey shirt topped with a darker grey tie. Clicking an expensive silver watch onto his wrist he positioned his tie over the now invisible Arc Reactor and stepped out towards the lounge room, dress shoes clacking against the pristine tiles.

"What are you wearing?" Tony looked the Captain up and down, taking in the higher then usual pants and drab looking top. Clint walked into the room, dressed in a simple black suit and tie ensemble. "I'm not going out with you looking like that,"

"He looks fine, Tony," Bruce walked into the room, also in a simple suit Tony didn't know he owned.

"He looks like a grandfather," Tony began marching towards his room "You're not my size, but I can make something work,"

"You do realise how gay you just sounded," Natasha walked into the room, high heels echoing off the tiles as they made contact. Dressed in a tight, form fitting black dress that slit halfway up her thigh she nearly made Clint drool.

Tony rolled his eyes and gestured for the Captain to follow. Steve looked a little uncertain as he followed Tony through his large room that had a sweeping view of the water and into a large closet space.

"Your closet is nearly as big as my apartment," he commented dryly.

"You need a bigger apartment. I can get you one, maybe in Manhattan? No, you don't look like a Manhattan boy.." Tony trailed off as he picked a light blue top off the rack, along with a black dinner jacket and slacks. "Try these on,"

Steve wondered how on earth he had gotten dragged into coming to Tony's Malibu home as he changed. He had to take part of the blame, he thought that after two months it was about time that the Avengers group attempted to at least try to know each other a little better. Tony had offered his home up for the experiment, and soon enough even Fury had agreed to let them enjoy their experiment.

Amazingly the top fit quiet well. Obviously it wasn't one Tony would wear, it wouldn't fit his shoulders right. Stepping out he found Tony holding out an expensive silver watch.

"One reason I never let Happy shop for me anymore, he doesn't know anything about tailored suits," Steve clicked on the watch "now come on Capsicle,"

Happy this time drove them to the restaurant in a limousine. Outside the restaurant where a group of screaming girls and boys, all holding various signs and screaming various things.

"How did they know we where coming here?" Steve asked as he avoided a pair of underwear thrown his way.

"I told them," Tony shrugged as he stepped into the expensively furnished restaurant.

"All of them?"

"I have millions of followers, word spreads quickly," Tony smiled at the blond haired solider.

"Followers?" Thor asked confused as he tugged at his tie. The suit had been given to him by Tony not long after his arrival back on Midgard, and he found it to be one of the most uncomfortable things in the world.

"Twitter? Facebook?" Tony quirked an eyebrow.

"Why would one want to take a book to the face?" Thor asked as he sat in one of the chairs that groaned under his weight "is that one of your strange Midgardian traditions?"

"I need alcohol," Tony groaned as he flagged down a server "one scotch,"

"Right away, Mr Stark," The server jotted it down on his leather bound pad "can I get anyone else any refreshments?"

Everyone ordered, Bruce and Steve (much to Tony's annoyance) ordering non-alcoholic drinks.

"You have got a lot to learn,"


	2. New Leaf

Steve knew it would be the right thing to do, after all, Tony had been kind enough to let him stay in his own personal home, and had even tried to be civil towards him despite all the bad things he had said in the past.

Steve often thought of himself as the good guy. He was after all, Captain America, hero to some, admired by most. In his younger years he had been scrawny and an easy target, children had terrorised him everyday. He soon earnt their respect, but really he only cared for the respect a single man would give him, Howard Stark.

Howard Stark was a good man who knew how to have a laugh. As a genius he had life set out for him. But that didn't seem to go to his head, the same couldn't be said for his son.

Anthony 'Tony' Stark, the self-proclaimed millionaire, playboy, genius philanthropist did not make a good first impression on the War hero. He was rash, self centred, and extremely egocentric. But after he had launched himself in the portal with the nuclear bomb, risking his own life, Steve had found some respect for him. Maybe he wasn't completely different from Howard.

That thought was what drove Steve towards Tony's garage. Welding could barley be heard towards the back of the room, accompanied by sparks. Tony spotted him and said something to the A.I and the garage door slid open.

"Jarvis can you turn the music down?" Steve had to admit it still felt weird talking to the A.I.

"I am sorry, Mr Rogers you are not authorized to do that," the British voice sounded from a computer console to his right.

He had to be authorized to turn down music? With a shake of his head he began walking forward towards the welding man. He had come this far, he wouldn't back down. He had to apologise to Tony, to start anew. The striped Avenger knew he had said some things to Tony that may have been out of line.

"Tony," He stopped as he watched the welding sparks stop and Tony roll out from where he had his head in the chest piece of his armour.

Tony turned off the music with a quick command to the A.I before looking at the Cap.

"What's up, Cap?" Tony asked as he took off his welding mask and chucked it on the floor "Jarvis, can you bring up the schematics, remove the outside armour and arc reactor,"

Blue holographs appeared in front of Tony and he began easily shifting through the computerized wires, connecting them here and there. Things like this amazed Steve.

"I want to apologise," he started slowly, watching as Tony froze for a moment before turning towards him with that same easy grin he always seemed to wear. The bright glow of his arc reactor was visible through his shirt. Steve knew what it was and what it did, and he had to admit he didn't want to know what it would feel like to have a piece of metal in his chest.

"Is this because you broke the TV?" Tony asked as he picked up some wire cutters, looked at the holograph, and disappeared in the suit again "because I told you, I don't really care,"

Steve grimaced at the memory. He and Thor had decided to watch a movie on and neither could figure out how to work the complicated universal remote. They had decided to try the buttons on the side but in his annoyance Thor had pressed down too hard and broken it.

"No, it's about what I said before, on the Hellicarrier," he stuck his hands in his pockets as he watched Tony pull out of the suit again and inspect the holographs.

"Like, two months ago? What about it?" Tony swiped away the suits schematics and went over to his computer. Sitting down at the table he tapped away at the keys, bringing up the programing for the suit.

"What I said was out of line," he watched Tony as he spun around in his chair. "I never should have said those things, I know what it feels like to be on the receiving end of bully-"

"You're seriously not going to say bullying, right?" Tony rolled his eyes as he wiped his hand on a rag before expending more glowing images into the space around them. "Bullying is for children. And for a matter of fact you did not _bully _me,"

"I still said things out of line-"

"Listen, Wing Head," Tony said "I don't care about your apology. Just let's forget you ever said those things."

"-It's just I always thought you'd be a bit more like Howard," Steve finished dully and he realised he must've said something wrong because Tony began sweeping away unneeded images with renewed vigour.

Here was the man that his father had always talked about. The great Captain America, the war hero, the greatest advancement in science. The ultimate weapon. He had been Tony's idol as a young boy, much like many others. He had listened eagerly as his father retold stories about the war days with the young hero. But soon the stories became old and Tony began to realise that Captain America was all his father talked about. Tony had built his first circuit board, his father had been to busy reading the latest file on the missing man to care, Tony built his first motorcycle and his father had only come to see it for the press photos.

"Well guess what, I'm not," he grunted as he shooed away the schematics.

It was a slight surprise to hear Tony talk like that. Usually boys wanted to be like their father, but the way Tony said it, it made it sound like a bad thing.

"He would've been proud of you," Steve said truthfully but Tony sighed.

"He had a million chances to tell me how proud he was, and guess what, he didn't even say it to my face. I found out through an old video that I easily couldn't have watched," Tony picked up the wire cutters again and cut off a length of wire that Dum-e offered to him.

"Just because he didn't say it doesn't mean he wasn't," Steve argued.

"You want to know what he was proud of?" Tony snapped "You."

Steve's eyes widened in surprise.

"It was always you. As a child you where my idol, you know that? But then the stories became tyring. He was always to busy searching for leads on you to bother about me. You where the greatest thing in the world in his eyes."

Tony barked out an order at his A.I who shifted the chest armour away and brought out a gauntlet. Picking it off the hooks he sat down in the chair again placed it on his hand. He didn't speak for a moment as he used a tiny screw driver to pull out the repulser that had a cracked glass plate.

"I'll accept your apology, Cap, but never compare me to my father again," he ran a hand through his hair "I get what you're doing, the whole turn over a new leaf thing, so lets just leave it at that. Because my house is a fun zone, any party poopers are forced by Stark law to leave,"

And just like that Tony seemed back to normal. It amazed Steve.

Steve sat down and pursed his lips, asking the question that had plagued him during his arrival at Starks Malibu Mansion.

"Is that why you don't have any photos of him?"

Tony looked surprised but then shrugged; "I'm not the nostalgic type," he replied.

Steve paused again, deciding it would be best just to ask these questions while he and Tony where on apparent good terms.

"How did he die? The file Fury gave me on what I needed to know didn't include any of that,"

"Car crash when I was seventeen," Tony didn't seem at all effected by the question "both he and my mother where in the car,"

"I'm sorry,"

"Not like it's your fault," Tony replied good heartedly. There was a silence for a moment until Tony asked "you really where friends with him, weren't you?"

"Howard was a great man," Steve nodded as he stood "I believe we're going to go swimming if you want to join,"

"I'll be up in a sec, Cap,"

Steve began walking out of the apparently 'off limits' garage but paused by the door.

"I really hope this new leaf thing will work,"

"Me too,"


	3. Swimming

**Swimming**

Luckily Tony didn't have to supply anyone with any bathing suits, no one would be stupid enough not to come to Malibu without something to swim in. Clint was already in the pool, floating on an inflatable circle, while Natasha (looking very hot in a simple black and red bikini) was sitting on the edge, long dangerous legs beneath its cool depths. Bruce was sitting on one of the lower steps of the pool, half submerged. The view was amazing, the infinity pool made it look as if you where about to swim right over the edge.

"Bomby!" Tony broke the tranquil silence as he ran past Steve and bombed into the deep end of the pool, the sudden wave causing Clint's circle to rock back and forth dangerously.

Thor, who had just arrived, copied Tony's motion and ran into the pool. The shock from his wave made water splatter everywhere, soaking Natasha, and causing Clint to fall off the ring.

"I like this!" Thor chuckled as he surfaced "we have things much like this in Asgard, only many times bigger!"

"Everything's bigger in Asgard," Tony said as he hauled himself onto the edge of the pool, water sliding off the face plate of the arc reactor. Steve wondered for a moment if it was water proof, then realised Tony was a _genius_, of course he had thought to make it water proof.

The Avengers had never seen the Arc Reactor in full (except Bruce) and they could see that it didn't just rest on the surface, it went into his chest cavity. Parts of his ribs and sternum had to be missing, and they imagined it would feel very weird.

"Indeed they are!" Thor smiled in agreement "you humans are so small!"

Tony stood up and headed towards a door off to the side where Clint had gotten the ring from. He pulled out various super soakers, noodles, and even an inflatable whale.

"Why would a grown man need all these things?" Bruce picked up the purple noodle.

"I have parties," Tony shrugged as he picked up his own noodle "come on Banner, lets fight,"

Tony put the noodle between his legs and began waving it around, making Natasha scowl and look away.

"Come on Banner," He continued to wave it, stepping forward he waved it in Bruce's face "can you imagine having a noodle fight with the other guy?"

Steve wondered if Tony was slightly ADD, his mood was always changing and he never seemed able to stay still.

"Tony, get that noodle out of my face," Bruce stated as calmly as ever.

"Make me," Tony took it out from between his legs and smacked it over his friends head, making a loud _clap_ at contact.

"Tony-"

_Clap_

"Tony-"

_Clap_

Steve saw Banners grip tightening on his noodle, and in a flash he had hit Tony on the side of the ribs, making the billionaire smile widely.

"Not green yet?" Tony pretended to peer closer at his friend before whacking him again "do you like being whacked with a noodle?"

Natasha let out a snort of laughter while Clint chuckled lightly. Bruce frowned before standing up and hitting Tony across the face.

"On guard!" Tony yelled as the pair began exchanging violent blows.

"I like this sport!" Thor chuckled as he pushed himself out of the water.

"Should we stop them?" Steve watched as Tony came dangerously close to slipping into the pool.

"I actually want to see who wins," Clint paddled along in the ring.

"Ten on Stark," Natasha said.

"You're on," the pair of assassins shook hands, sealing the deal.

Thor though, decided he wanted to try out this strange Midgardian sport, and picked up a noodle of his own, gripping it tightly in his hands he advanced on the pair. One sharp _crack _later, Thor's noodle was in half and Stark was clutching his ribs.

"Whoa, big guy," Tony dropped his noddle and massaged his red ribs "careful with that noodle,"

"My apologies, friend Stark," Thor smiled brightly "I thought this 'noodle' weapon would be stronger,"

"It's made of foam," Tony picked up the already inflated dolphin and bounded into the water.

"Stark, your phones still in your pocket," Natasha said the beginnings of Tony's clear phone beginning to slip out from the pocket of his board shorts.

Tony dug into his pocket, looked at the wet phone, before dropping it into the water where it lay on the tiled floor. "You honestly think I didn't make it water proof?"

Suddenly the phone began ringing on the floor, vibrating across the tiles. Tony swore under his breath and jumped off the dolphin, picking the phone off the floor and answering it.

"You've reached Tony Stark, if this isn't a booty call, then please leave a message," Steve wondered why Tony would answer his phone like that, but quickly figured it was Pepper.

"No booty call? This is about work? I made you the CEO so you could deal with this stuff!" Tony whined into the phone as he hoisted himself back onto his dolphin, grunting all the way "That noise? It was just Penelope,"

_Penelope? _Clint mouthed to Natasha who just shrugged.

"Yeah, I just decided to ride her," Tony made the plastic make loud, annoying noise. "yep, I got it, yes Ms Potts, I won't forget. Don't forget to come across next week!"

He put the phone back into his pocket and gripped the dolphin.

"You named the dolphin Penelope?" Clint said as he watched Tony adjust himself on it.

"Actually, Pepper did," he patted the plastic blow up toy "got me it for my birthday,"

"She got you a dolphin for your birthday?" Steve crossed his arms over his chest.

"Actually, she got me a real dolphin, but that's at _Sea World_," it was odd how Tony could still somehow look serious while riding the dolphin.

"What don't you own?" Steve questioned.

"A dog," Tony watched as Steve made his way into the water "though, Dum-e is kind of like a dog…."

"Sir, the new TV has arrived," Jarvis spoke "would you like to me allow the men past the gate?"

"Yeah, sure," Tony paddled over to the edge "let them in and tell them to install it for me,"

"Wouldn't it be quicker if you did it?" Natasha asked "I thought you didn't like people touching your toys,"

"Ever tried putting in a TV while wet?" Natasha quirked an eyebrow "it doesn't end up well,"

Tony sat up on the edge and pulled out his phone again, looking at the camera feeds as the men came to install it.

"Paranoid?"

"After the repairs I found a pair of my underwear for sale on E-bay," Tony watched the men stop outside the house "went for a lot, actually,"

"Who would want to buy your underwear?" Steve frowned slightly.

"A man in Chicago who was willing to pay a lot," Tony chuckled "one thing you need to know Capsicle, people now are strange,"

"Take Tony for example," Bruce added "a grown man who owns a blow up dolphin named Penelope,"

"You're just jealous, did they even have pools in Dubai?"

"Bangladesh,"

"Same difference," Tony shrugged half heartedly "I feel like cookies, does anyone else want any?"

"Sir, Mr Odinson finished the cookies this morning," Jarvis chimed in.

"You ate my cookies," Tony gave the god a death glare.

"And the poptarts," Natasha added.

"You ate my cookies and my poptarts," Tony scowled as he grabbed a towel "new rule, no one can touch my pantry,"

"We have to eat somehow," Bruce commented "just get Happy to buy you some more,"

"Do you know how expensive those cookies where?"

Bruce shook his head.

"I don't know either," Tony commented as he scrubbed his hair dry "is that something I should know?"

Before anyone could answer Tony, the billionaire had already pulled out his phone.

"Yeah, Happy, can you get me some cookies?"


	4. Mobile Phone & Revenge

**Mobile Phone & Revenge**

After an order in meal of greasy Chinese Tony appeared in the lounge room where the mighty Avengers where watching _Wizard of Oz_.

"Seriously? If you wanted a movie with midgets you should've watched _Charlie and the Chocolate Factory_," Tony plopped into a chair and looked at the badly animated flying scene.

"The Captain chose it, it's one movie he actually knows," Bruce was leaning into a chair.

"Well, I'm about to give you a healthy dose of the twenty first century," Tony threw something at Steve, making him move quickly to catch it. Turning it over in his hands he wondered what it was. "It's a phone,"

"It doesn't look like yours," Steve pressed one of the buttons on the side and watched as the blank glass flung to life, a photo of the American flag making up the background.

"No one else has a Stark Phone, not quiet in that market yet," Tony inspected his own clear phone "that's an IPhone 4s, my buddy Steve Jobs used to run the company,"

"I guess I shouldn't be surprised that you knew Steve Jobs," Bruce muttered "what about Bill Gates?"

"We don't talk much anymore," Tony shrugged "actually, I'll have Pepper set up a meeting with him,"

Steve had figured out how to unlock the phone and was now looking at the various things on the screen. Tapping on one he watched as a series of different photos popped up on the screen.

"How do you use it?" he asked, turning it around in his hands again, jumping suddenly as it vibrated. A picture of Tony popped up on the screen he saw the armoured Avenger smiling at him, own phone clasped in his hands.

"This is going to be fun,"

Tony had Jarvis set up an automatic call every hour on the hour, and he set the ring tone to '_American Idiot_'. During the night Steve would be shocked awake by the loud music sounding from his bedside table, accompanied by the continuous message of '_are you awake yet? Are you awake now?_' He would love nothing more then to throw the phone at the well painted walls and watch it shatter, but it was a gift.

"Here," Natasha said during breakfast when the phone began ringing again. Tony was nowhere in sight, obviously still asleep. She tapped a couple of buttons and said "it won't play anymore,"

"Thank you," Steve nodded as he looked at the phone "How do you work it?"

"This is internet, that's contacts, that music, and that's photos. That's really all you need to know," Bruce said as he picked up the phone and pointed to each thing "just ignore the rest,"

Bruce went through all the contacts, frowning when he came upon some less that helpful numbers. Deleting them he left only the ones he knew the Captain would need. Then he went through the photos and his frown deepened as he saw numerous self shots of Tony, along with pictures of scarcly dressed women only covered by American Flags.

"I'm afraid to look at his phone now," Bruce gave the phone back.

"It's see through, it's not like he can hide any disgusting things he has on it," Clint commented as he stopped looking over Bruce's shoulder.

"He had two phones, Clint," Natasha stated "one for pleasure and another for business,"

"I haven't seen the other phone," Bruce's' brow crinkled.

"He wired it so all the calls go through to Peppers',"

"Does Tony actually ever do any work?" Clint asked.

"I've been running that company since I was twenty-one, I think I've done enough work for a life time," Tony greeted them as he bounded into the kitchen, hair a mess but goatee perfectly shaved.

"Obadiah Stane did all the work, Stark, while you where out partying," Natasha corrected him.

"I was twenty-one," Tony poured himself a bowl of cereal "besides, blame Rhodes, he's such a party animal I couldn't help myself,"

He sat down at the table and began attempting to reach the orange juice that was up by Clint, making childish grabbing motions. Clint rolled his eyes and picked it up, holding it out for Tony to grab.

"Are you going to take it?" Clint questioned as his hand hung mid air between them.

"I don't like being handed things," Tony replied like it was obvious.

"Just take it," Clint jerked his arm forward.

"Just set it down on the table," Tony waited for Clint to do so.

"Stop being childish," Clint said "and take the god damned juice,"

"Bruce?"

Bruce was more then used to Tony's odd habits and he took the juice off Clint and set it in front of Tony who happily poured himself a glass.

"Why don't you like being handed things?" Steve asked.

"Probably because he had everything handed to him on a silver platter," Clint muttered.

"Watch it Birdbrain," Tony snapped.

"What is wrong with being handed things on a silver platter?" Thor asked confused "it is not gold, but silver is just as good,"

"As a matter of fact, even my mother set things down for me," Tony dug into his cereal.

"You let your robots hand you things," Natasha pointed out.

"No I don't," Tony countered "they set it down."

"I've seen your robots pass you plenty of things," Bruce argued.

"Those where Stark regulated helper robots, they weren't programed to set things down," Tony countered back "and at least they're sanitary,"

"What, now you're afraid of germs?"

"Can we just leave it?" Tony asked "so what if I don't like being handed things?"

"It is a little odd," Steve commented.

"Says the man who thinks a blackberry is a fruit,"

"Isn't it?" Steve asked confused.

Tony tried to resist a face palm "it's a phone, Gramps,"

"How did they make a blackberry into a phone?"

"It would strange magic indeed," Thor nodded in agreement.

"I'm surrounded by idiots," Tony pushed away from the table "I'll be down in the genius only area,"

"Why can't we go into your lab? We could in the Tower," Clint argued.

"Are you a certified genius?" Tony raised an eyebrow.

"No,"

"That's why you're not allowed in, only Bruce is, oh, Jarvis set up those codes for you," He added looking at his science buddy "and Jarvis deactivated yours," he added to Natasha.

When Tony disappeared into the bowels of his home, Clint got an almost devious smile on his face.

"Genius area only my arse," He jumped up on the bench and looked at the air vent.

"Tony said not to go in the air vents," Steve argued.

"Chuck me your phone," Steve handed it over hesitantly.

"What are you going to do?" Bruce crossed his arms over his chest.

"Just because it's his house doesn't mean I have to stick to the rules," He yanked the vent off "and I got pretty sick of hearing that stupid song all night,"

He pushed himself up into the vent and disappeared from sight. He knew that he had to keep heading down. Clint preferred climbing through the air vents of every safe house S.H.E.I.L.D placed him in, and it didn't take him long to find the underground lab.

Music was playing so loud Clint almost winced. Pushing aside the grate he landed gracefully beside a half completed hot rod car. Tony didn't seem to notice him as he welded away at his suit. The two robots Dum-e and You beeped slightly at his entrance, but didn't approach Tony.

He hid behind Tony's collection of desks and quickly logged into his itunes account, downloading the needed app and set it down on the table, timer ticking away. He knew it would take a while for Tony to find it because he had buried it under a stack of different papers and tools. Tony really had to clear up his desk.

When Tony wasn't looking he vaulted on top of some shelves and into the tight fitted air vents to wait. The timer ticked down and he could hear the soft beginnings of the noise from up in the air vent.

"Jarvis turn the music off," the sound was beginning to get steadily louder. Tony rubbed his ears and spun around "when was the house last sprayed?"

"Before your arrival sir, may I suggest-"

"Mute," the system shut up but the helper robots began beeping wildly.

"Can you two shut up?" The robots piped down for the moment and Tony looked around.

Clint watched with amusement as Tony paced the length of his large garage, trying to find the source of the buzzing. He clapped the magazine against his hand in his annoyance. After ten minutes he began to get annoyed. Tony paced near the cars when he noticed the grate was missing.

"Barton," Tony growled as he staked towards his desk and set down the magazine "Unmute,"

"Bring up security footage,"

Clint began slowly shifting further back into the vent. The loud buzzing stopped as Tony found the iPhone and shut it off skilfully. By this time Clint was long gone. Tony though was avid on his rules and had already begun work on his revenge.

It was done by mid day and while Clint was fighting Natasha in the ring he went into his room and stuck the various coin sized items all over the room.

Clint after dinner went to get some sort of desert from the fridge but he found it wouldn't open.

"Under Stark Law you are not permitted to have desert," Tony swept into the kitchen with his usual boyish grace.

"Stark Law?"

"House rules, you not only climbed in the vents, but you came into my lab. No desert for you," he clapped his colleague on the shoulder and opened the freezer with ease, pulling out an icecream for desert.

"This is your revenge?"

"Don't you think its good?" Tony asked "Jarvis has locked you out of all the food storage areas,"

"For a genius you're really petty," Clint returned.

"Don't go in my lab,"

"Don't play music all night,"

"My house,"

"I'm a guest,"

"Technically if you're a guest I can choose what you can and cannot eat,"

"You don't treat guests that way,"

"Just go back to that nest of yours birdbrain before you hurt yourself, I can smell your brain being fried from here," Tony bit into the rich chocolate ice cream.

"You calling me dumb?"

"I'm not calling you smart," Tony shrugged as he began to walk out of the kitchen.

That night Clint lay in bed, just beginning to drift off, the depths of sleep beckoning to him, but a fly buzzed somewhere near his ear and he attempted to sleepily brush it away. The buzzing continued and Clint sat up and allowed his hearing to lead him to a little coin sized device stuck under his bedside table. Smashing it he was just about to go to bed as the buzzing started up again.

He found another one and crushed it. It seemed every time he would be about to drift asleep the buzzing would start again. It took him until two a.m to finally fall asleep, but at four he was awoken by the same loud buzzing right next to his year. Crushing yet another device he frowned at Tony's home grown revenge.

Tony had no idea what he had started.


	5. Pet Peeves

**Pet Peeves **

In the morning Tony came down to breakfast dressed in a black suit jacket and pants, along with a crimson red top that stopped the glow from his chest. Hair slicked back with expensive red tinted glasses in his pocket he whistled past Clint who sent daggers at him.

"Where are you going?" Bruce asked as he watched Tony pull out a disgusting looking green drink "and what is that?"

"Chlorophyll," he smacked his lips.

"Chlorophyll?" Steve asked confused "why would you drink that?"

"I used to drink it eighty times a day, and I'm not exaggerating," Tony finished the cup and chucked it in the sink "I drink it occasionally to make sure the shrapnel isn't doing anything,"

"Why did you drink that much?"

"I was dying, it happens," Tony shrugged as he looked at his watch "I have meetings all day, try not to break things,"

"Sir, Colonel Rhodes is at the door, shall I let him in?" Jarvis asked in his cool British accented voice.

"Yeah," Tony said to A.I as he checked his phone quickly.

"What time do you think you'll be home?" Steve asked.

"One,"

"P.M?"

"A.M" Tony stated "if you're lucky,"

A dark skinned man dressed in formal military wear stepped into the sun filled dining room, looking cool and collected. An MIT ring was on one hand, while a special air force ring on the other. The range of medals on his suit gave an indication to his military ability.

"Platypus!" Tony hugged the man lightly.

"Tony, good to have you back man," the dark skinned man clapped him on the shoulder "Hi, I'm Colonel James Rhodes with the U.S Airforce,"

"Pleasure to meet you Colonel, I'm Captain Rogers," Steve stood up and shook the mans hand.

"I've heard a lot about you from Tony," Rhodes sent a side on look at Tony who shrugged unabashed.

"We're trying this whole turning over a new leaf thing," Tony explained "now come on, Happy's already here,"

"I didn't see him,"

"We're taking the Royce," Tony explained "now come on, Happy has my cookies,"

"It was nice meeting you all," the Colonel spoke over his shoulder before following Tony towards the garage area.

With Tony gone for the day everyone was left to their own devices. Thor and the Captain began fighting in the Gym, trying their best trying not to break anything, Bruce went down to the Garage to do god knows what, while the two master assassins found themselves walking around the large grounds.

"I don't see why anyone would even need this much space, Stark practically lives in his garage," Clint kicked up a stone.

"He does use the stuff, amazingly," Natasha and Clint stopped by the cliff edge.

"I keep forgetting you worked for him," Clint smiled at her.

"It was just one of many assignments," Natasha said "much less important then the others,"

"I suppose you should count yourself lucky you survived," Clint crossed his arms over his chest and gazed across the ocean "he's interrupted my sleep two times now,"

"Why don't you just get him back?" Natasha asked "I know I would certainly want to,"

"Feeling a bit childish, Agent Romanoff?" Clint asked with a raised eyebrow.

"We're supposed to be getting to know each other a little bit better, and Stark needs to learn not to mess with us," Natasha folded her own arms over her chest.

"I'm guessing you have an idea?" They began walking back towards the house.

"I know every single one of Tony's pet peeves," Natasha bounded up the steps and headed towards Tony's room. Clint found it was, large, expansive and had a fantastic view of the ocean. "Go get the fluffiest pillows you can find,"

Clint frowned slightly at the request but still bounded down stairs and found directions to the linen cupboard (it was more of a room) and picked the fluffiest pillow he could.

"Are we remaking his bed?" Clint asked as he watched Natasha change over the pillows.

"Tony can't sleep on anything soft," Natasha said as she placed them back in the perfect position before entering the apartment sized closet.

"I was thinking of something a little worse," he watched as Natasha change around the order of his shirts, reds with blues, greens with blacks.

"Every little thing will make him snap," Natasha smiled at him.

"Like Monaco?"

"Exactly like Monaco,"

All around the house various things where put out of place. His DVD's where changed, CD's put out of order, they even messed up his pantry, hiding all the sweet stuff he liked so much so that he would never find them.

"What about his garage?" Clint questioned as he looked at the stairs leading down to the genius only zone.

"Banners down there," Natasha began walking away. Clint followed her, surprised to find himself in a full on office, a large expensive table was laden with paper work and various bits of seemingly broken machines.

"He has an office?" Clint watched as Natasha picked up the discarded pieces of metal.

"Stark uses it when Pepper forces him to," Natasha picked up a random blueprint and chucked it to the side "and she's coming across soon,"

"Why?"

"Stark Annual Benefit Dinner," she straightened with a satisfied sigh "that should do it,"

"A suit and tie affair?" Clint and Natasha began making their way towards the gym.

"Bow tie," Natasha said "The money's going towards the New York Re-construction fund,"

"So that means we have to go," Clint frowned at the thought. He had never been much of a public person, and now it seemed everywhere he went cameras where waiting to take his picture.

"I'm not enjoying the publicity either, don't think you're the only one who has to suffer through it," the red headed agent stoped outside the gym where loud clanging could be heard "it comes with the job,"

"It's a liability," Clint added.

"One I'm sure we can manage,"


	6. Flooring Habits

**Flooring Habits**

When Steve awoke at his usual time of five he found a very strange sight welcoming him into the morning. Tony was asleep on the floor at the bottom of the steps without any form of comfort or back support. It was obvious it hadn't been done in a drunken haze because his jacket, sunglasses and shoes where all placed neatly by his head.

At six when Clint made it down Tony was still on the floor, deeply asleep. He too frowned at the perfectly cared for personals before making his way towards the main kitchen. Natasha just ignored her fellow Avengers as she came down for breakfast. Stark was an odd person, and if he wanted to sleep on the floor, so be it.

Thor was more then used to finding people asleep on the floor, after all the parties in Asgard often found people incapable of making their way to their chambers. He didn't think twice about the folded clothes, servants would usually leave personal items near those that had collapsed.

Bruce frowned slightly as he saw Tony asleep on the floor, Tony, about once a month, would be found either asleep on a hard cot in the lab, or on the floor.

"Does Tony usually sleep on the floor?" Steve asked as he sat down at the table.

"Sometimes," Bruce shrugged as he poured himself a bowl of cereal.

"I cannot find the poptarts," Thor said from the large pantry.

"Maybe Tony ate them," Natasha said as she calmly made herself a black coffee.

Thor crinkled his brow before sitting down at the table, taking up cereal instead "I do not see how these charms are lucky, but I suppose they would suffice for the lack of poptarts," he said as he poured the charms into his bowl.

"All ten boxes?" Bruce snorted "I doubt it,"

"What do you doubt, science brother?" Tony strolled into the room, hair wet from a shower and eyes covered by darkly tinted sunglasses. He went into the pantry to look for breakfast.

"That you ate all ten boxes of poptarts," Bruce said at the same time Tony said;

"Where are my poptarts?" he turned on Thor "did you eat my poptarts?"

"I did not, friend Stark," Thor spoke gravely "the missing poptarts have effected me also, I am stuck eating these _Lucky Charms_,"

"Does your voice have to be so loud?" Tony muttered as he got some chlorophyll and an apple.

"How much did you drink last night?" Steve asked as Tony sat down.

"I lost count," Tony shrugged as he leaned behind him and picked up a motorcycle magazine.

"What if we had needed you?" Steve questioned, obviously trying to quell his annoyance.

"I can operate the suit drunk," Tony rolled his eyes "even asked Widow over there,"

"You blasted watermelon, Stark," Natasha said in the same cool voice "I don't think that counts as operating the suit,"

"I didn't have the automated guidance system on, that aiming was all my work," Tony flicked through the magazine "look at the exhaust on that baby…anyway, you could call in Rhodes with the War Machine,"

"You're missing the point," Steve ground his teeth together "you where so drunk you slept on the floor,"

"Actually, I chose to sleep on the floor," Tony crunched into his apple "anyway, you better be nice to me if you want your surprise,"

"What surprise?" Steve was effectively distracted.

"I got nearly all of you a surprise. Not Romanoff or Barton because they broke my rules," Tony shot a glare at Natasha "I know it was you who changed my shirts, it's going to take Pepper hours to get them back right,

"Oh Bruce, that reminds me, I need you to grow a moustache," Bruce frowned deeply at that out of the way statement.

"Why do I need to grow a moustache?" Bruce asked.

"I want to see if the other guy gets one, can you imagine that? A giant green smashing machine running around with a moustache," Tony smiled at his own thought.

"I'm not growing a moustache," Bruce sighed as he rubbed his temples.

"Beard?"

"No, Tony," Bruce sighed.

"Don't tell me he's harassing you about the moustache idea," spoke Pepper from the doorway as she began making her way into the room, dressed as perfectly as ever.

"Think about it Pepper, a Hulk with a moustache!" Tony stood and snaked his arms around her waist.

"Have you been drinking?" She flicked his glasses.

"Maybe," He shrugged and went in for kiss, but Pepper back away.

"And been drinking chlorophyll?"

"It's a great hangover cure," Tony replied "one kiss?"

"Sign these papers then maybe I'll consider it," Pepper shoved a clip board towards him and Tony sighed and quickly signed the papers. After a quick, passionate, slightly sickening kiss Pepper sat down at the table.

"Morning," she smiled at them.

"Morning," they replied watching as her fingers moved over her blackberry with amazing speed.

"Oh, Tony, two surprises are coming today," She looked at her boyfriend who frowned slightly. Pepper leant in closer to whisper in his ear and he frowned only deepened.

"No way,"

"Yes way," Pepper said "act nice and I'll get you that motorcycle you've been wanting,"

"I could think of something I want more-"

"Tony," Pepper cut him off with a blush and quickly changed the subject "all of you have been invited to the Annual Stark Benefit Dinner, the moneys going towards helping pay the debt the incident in New York created,"

She pulled out crisp envelopes from her bag and handed one to each "you're scheduled in for suit fittings at eleven tomorrow,"

"Suit fittings?" Bruce asked "I already have one,"

"You need a fitted suit for this," Pepper shot Tony a warning look "this is one of the biggest benefit dinners in existence, and everyone who is anyone will be there. You're going to be the centre of attention,"

"Can I say no?" Clint asked as he looked at the thick paper that held his invitation.

"Fury said you can't," Pepper replied smoothly as she sat back down "apparently its an order,"

"Those suits are restraining and unnecessary, I shall enter this ball wearing the armour of my people, not dressed as some Midgardian fool," Thor rumbled from his position at the table.

"Do you want your surprise?" Tony asked playfully.

"I would indeed like to know what this surprise is," Thor nodded.

"Then wear the suit," he stood and chucked his rubbish from breakfast into the kitchen. Pepper sighed and stood.

"You can wear your armour if you want, Thor," Pepper said to the Asgardian "Tony, don't even think about hiding in that garage,"

"Whipped," Clint whispered to Natasha who just raised an eyebrow

While Pepper went to get Tony, the group began to go there separate ways. Steve went to go sit out on the balcony, leather bound sketch book in hand, Thor went to try his luck with a TV again, and the master assassins went to battle it out in the ring.

"Sir, Mr Hogan is making his way down the drive," Jarvis chimed in on Tony who was watching Pepper fix up his shirts, her tight arse moving behind her form fitting skirt.

"Tony, are you staring at my arse?" Pepper asked as she turned around.

"Yes," Tony answered blatantly "I was staring at the beautifully sculptured, well rounded, firm-"

"Sir, Mr Hogan is at the door,"

"You should answer that," Pepper said when Tony shifted in closer towards her, arm snaking around her waist yet again.

"Maybe we shouldn't," Tony replied "we should stay in here and do-"

"Captain Rogers is requesting your presence," Jarvis spoke up yet again.

"Tony," Pepper smiled at him "its polite to greet guests when they arrive,"

"I haven't greeted you properly yet,"

"Tony,"

"Fine," Tony sighed as he began taking long strides towards the front of the house, Pepper clicking behind him "Jarvis, get Thor,"

"Right away, Sir,"

Tony bounded down the steps into the main living room to see Happy dropping two bags in the entrance way besides a tall, brunette woman, and another not so tall, glasses wearing brunette woman.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, ma'am," Steve was already sweet talking the brunettes.

"Pleasures all mine," the younger brunettes eyes scaled up the Captains form.

"You must be Jane and Darcy, I'm Pepper Potts, we talked on the phone," Pepper stepped forward and shook each of the ladies hands "this is Tony Stark,"

"It's an honour to meet you," the bubbly brunette named Darcy said as she bounced forward and offered her hand. Tony smiled and shook it "I did one of my papers on you,"

"I would read it, but its about politics," Tony said before offering his hand to the other brunette "but I have read your papers, very interesting,"

"Thank you," she breathed as she looked around the large open area "thank you for the invitation-"

"Jane Foster! Darcy Lewis!" Thor boomed as he entered the room, making Tony wince slightly "it is good to see you again!"

Thor enveloped the pair in a tight hug while Happy moved out of the way of the giant god. At the sound of the booming voices Banner, Clint and Natasha had all come out of there various hidy holes to see what the situation was.

"Its like bicep heaven," Darcy sighed as she gazed at the array of men in front of her.

"What are you doing here?" Thor asked his friends.

"Darcy is visiting someone but Mr Stark invited me to go to his benefit dinner," Jane said happily "you haven't changed a bit,"

"Neither have you," Thor chuckled. The others began to shift away, Tony was having a quick conversation with Happy, and the master assassins wanted to go back to sparring.

"Mr Stark can I have a photo? No one is going to believe this back on campus," Darcy made her own little conversation.

"Why not?" Tony smiled.

While Darcy got her photo with the billionaire, Thor lead Jane through the house and out onto a balcony.

"This house is amazing," she breathed as she sat down "how long have you been down?"

"For nigh over five days," Thor said as he too sat down "I am taking a moment to know my brothers in arms,"

"I always knew you where destined for great things," Jane sighed as she looked at him "When S.H.E.I.L.D shifted me to that conference knew you had to be here,"

"Loki was up to his old mischief again," Thor shook his head "but the All Father has dealt with him. How is Erik Selvig?"

"He's good," Jane nodded enthusiastically "still a little shaken, but he's gone back to work. Are you staying long?"

"Allfather has permitted me to stay as long as I choose, the Bifrost is near completion so soon Lady Sif and the Warriors Three are coming down," Thor smiled at the memory of his friends.

"Mr Odinson, Mr Stark requests your presence in the west lounge room," the cool British voice broke through the balcony.

"Who is that?" Jane jumped, a hand resting over her jumping heart.

"I am Jarvis, Mr Starks personal Artificial Intelligent System that cares for his house," the voice replied.

"You're a robot," Jane frowned.

"Artificial Intelligence," corrected the A.I

"Come, we must not keep friend Stark waiting in his own home," Thor began walking through the house, and Jane marvelled at it's size.

The west lounge room had a large glass window that shed light into a white furnished room. All the Avengers seemed to be lounging in various positions, and Jane felt extremely out of place.

"I'm Doctor Bruce Banner," one man stood to fill the silence.

"Jane Foster," she shook his hand.

"Those are agents Romanoff and Barton," he gestured to two people on the same lounge who nodded at them.

"Come, sit," Tony flung his arms around the room as he sunk further into the lounges "what's your drink?"

"What Tony is really saying is what would everyone like to drink?" Pepper corrected quickly.

"I'm fine thank you," Jane sat hesitantly next to Thor.

"We don't bite you know…well, Hulk might," Tony shrugged as he kicked his feet up on the coffee table, catching the look Steve gave him he said "my house, my rules,"

There was a bit of a silence, but Pepper found a way to fill it. "So, how uh, did you two meet?"

"I hit him with my car," Jane blushed "twice,"

"I do not want to get on your bad side," Tony muttered as he stretched, the fabric of his shirt thinning to reveal the soft glow of his arc reactor "I suppose I don't need to tell you the rules, everyone else seems to break them,"

"Just don't go down into his lab," Bruce said with a thin smile "certified genius area only,"

"I'm certified," Jane said.

"Boy only area. I would invite you to join the club, but it's Science _Bro's, _and if we add a girl that'll mess things up," Tony shrugged.

"Don't worry, he's always this insane,"


	7. Red

**Did you hear that in the next Thor movie the main villains are going to be Greeks? Hercules it going to be the main antagonist (I get this off the Marvel Movie Database) but isn't that just awesome?  
**

**Constellations & Red**

"Your stars are strange," Thor spoke as he gazed up at the stars and constellations.

He and Jane where laying out on the drew ridden grass of Tony's Mansion, gazing up at the stars above. With the light pollution some where faint and unrecognisable, fading into the background to be forgotten.

"I like our stars," Jane folded her arms behind her head.

"I see none of my own constellations," Thor gazed across at her "none of the Allfather or the conquests of the Frost Giants,"

"Our constellation are like yours," Jane offered up "you tell stories from the stars, so do we,"

"What is your favourite? When I was younger Father used to tell me the stories of Abiogenesis and Anthropogenesis,"

"Fire and ice," Jane smiled as her mind remembered the story.

"The creators of the nine worlds," Thor nodded with a smile "it is a great story,"

"I like the story of Andromeda," Jane said "she was to be sacrificed to a horrible monster, but then the hero Perseus slayed the monster and saved her."

"To save a maiden is a heroes job," Thor smiled brightly "it is perhaps the best part of the job,"

"I'm guessing you've had a lot of experience saving maidens," Jane smiled softly and rolled onto her side.

"But none as fair as you," Thor to rolled onto his side and gazed at her.

Jane blushed deeply at the statement "Thor…"

"Are you staying for the dinner? I would be honoured if you would come with me," Thor kept on going.

"I'd love to," Jane smiled wider at him.

"This is perhaps one of the best surprises I have ever received," Thors voice broke the silence of the dark night.

"I thought it was a joke when Pepper first called me, I mean Tony Stark inviting me to stay at his Malibu beach home? Insane," Jane laughed lightly "I can't even imagine living in a place like this,"

"This is nothing compared to Asgard, towering buildings of gold, jewels so big they compare to nothing on this planet, halls so grand you could fit what Tony calls a city block inside of them," Thor gave a happy sigh.

"I would like to see it one day," Jane gazed up at the sky again "it sounds wonderful,"

"Once the Bifrost is complete I will gladly take you there," Thor sat up "the hour grows late,"

"I suppose we should head in," Jane nodded as she took Thors outstretched hand and stood. They strolled across the grounds until the door opened automatically to grant them acess. Thor accompanied Jane to the last free room in the house and kissed her hand in leaving.

"I will see you in the morning," Thor said as he pulled away and began walking down the hall towards his own room.

"Who said chivalry was dead?" Jane questioned as she entered the expansive room.

*AV*

"That was low," Tony glared across the table at the pair of assassins.

"What was low?" Pepper questioned as she sat down at the table with a plate of toast.

"They changed my pillows," Tony grunted as he stole a bite of Pepper's toast.

"That's why you kept on tossing and turning," Pepper mused.

"I bet it looked like you where having a flash light party," Bruce chimed in and Tony glared at him.

"Pepper makes me cover it," Tony retorted.

"You try sleeping with a light in your face," Pepper snapped back.

"Good morning," Thor chimed when he entered the room, the still hesitant Jane following behind him "have we found the poptarts?"

"No," Tony said glumly as he sipped from his cup "they're still missing,"

"Help yourself to anything in the kitchen Jane," Pepper smiled kindly at the brunette.

"Not the cookies," Tony added and Pepper rolled her eyes.

Tony leant on the table and pulled out his phone, beginning to tap wildly on it. The skins flickered faster then the eye could see, but Tony seemed able to keep it all up. He let out a bark of laughter at sometime and passed the phone to Bruce who frowned slightly.

"What is it?" Pepper asked.

"Avenger cats!" Tony chortled as he took the phone back off Bruce "Cat eye, Black Cat, Iron Mew, Captain Ameowrica…. Hilarious,"

"You're looking at cats," Natasha said slowly to Tony who just smiled wider.

"Don't ditch it till you tried it," Tony shrugged as he slipped his phone away "now get dressed children, we're going shopping,"

"Shopping?" Jane asked confused.

"Tony's treating everyone to some new clothes," Pepper said simply before glaring at Tony who had gone to fish his phone out again "do not tweet it,"

"Facebook?"

"No, Tony," Pepper sighed "I'll call Happy,"

"You don't have to buy me anything Mr Stark, I've already brought a dress," Jane tried to say but Tony just waved his hand, shooing away the thought.

"It's nothing," he began walking backwards towards the stairs "and call me Tony, my dad was Mr Stark!"

By the time everyone was ready to leave, Happy had pulled up the limo. They would be dropping the girls off before the guys went to go and get there suits. Tony already had one set out so he wouldn't be buying one, but he wouldn't let the others leave without one.

"Do you need my card?" Tony asked as Happy pulled up outside a dress shop, Pepper nodded and Tony pulled out the sleek card and handed it to her "have fun,"

In the store Jane felt out of place in her _Jeans West _jeans and cheep top. But as soon as the card was scanned upon entrance, the shop assistants where on them like bees on honey numerous different dresses were thrown her way, and once she escaped to the change room she tried to get through it as quickly as possible.

"You look gorgeous," a shop assistant exclaimed as she came out in a crimson dress "perfect for the Stark dinner, though what will your date be wearing?"

"Red," Jane nodded after a thought "definitely red,"

"Perfect! I know the perfect clutch to go with it," the shop assistant beamed "if you change out of that we'll have an assistant ring it,"

In the end Natasha had settled for a form fitting little black dress that revealed her long and dangerous legs, Pepper had opted for a cream silk dress with an open back. As the shop assistant rung it up Jane's eyes widened almost comically.

"That's to expensive," Jane insisted "no one needs to spend that much money on a dress,"

"It's fine, Dr Foster, Stark wouldn't have given us his credit card if he didn't want us to spend that much," Natasha said as she watched Pepper inform the assistant that they'd be back to collect them later.

"But I'm only going to wear it once," Jane followed the pair out of the shop.

"Most of the stuff Tony buys me I only wear a couple of times," Pepper gave Jane a kind smile "now quickly, we have an appointment at Tiffanies."

*AV*

"I am not wearing this," Clint looked at himself in the mirror. In the reflection he could see a smirking Tony that was inspecting an array of ties.

"And I appreciate the thought Tony, but it's to much," Steve added in from his own corner of the room where he was being measured for the suit.

Tony sighed and pulled out his phone, bringing up the latest credit card transactions.

"Well, seeing as those lovely females of ours have already gotten up to a total of a couple of thousand dollars, I think we're good," Tony slipped the phone back into his pocket and looked at the Asgardian warrior that was inspecting some cuff links.

"And besides, you still need watches, shoes, and cuff links," an assistant came and gave him a glass of cucumber water.

"Thor doesn't have to wear a suit," Clint pointed out.

"Thor could smash me into the ground before I could even manage to get him measured for a suit," Tony pointed out "and don't say you would be able to do the same because I know for a fact your arrows are in your room and that the gun you had strapped to ankle had to be removed upon entry,"

"It's not that bad," Bruce tried to lighten the mood from where he was getting his suit packed.

"Its bad enough that we have to go, let alone wear a monkey suit," Clint muttered darkly.

"For a spy you complain a lot,"

Clint muttered darkly about keying Tony's car to death while the assistant finally told him he could change. Half an hour later the bill was finally given and the men finally left the suit shop and headed straight into another for shoes.

"For a straight man you shop like a gay one," Clint commented darkly as he chucked on a pair of extravagant shoes.

"For a man you whine like a girl," Tony quipped back.

The fighting kept on going back and forth for the whole day until finally they met up with the girls. Happy loaded the mountain of clothes into the car before beginning to drive back towards the mansion.

"Wait Cap, now it's time for your surprise," Tony held Steve back as they exited the car "come on, we don't have much time to waste,"

Pepper sent Steve a knowing look before the pair disappeared down into the garage. Tony punched in the pin and entered the garage. Stopping in front of his cars he said;

"Happy's driving you in the Rolls-Royce," Tony went over to a desk and picked up some keys, "you have reservations for a private room at _Blue Flame_, go nuts,"

Happy made his way into the garage while Steve stood there confused.

"Why would I need reservations?"

"I got you some," Tony chucked the keys to Happy.

"And you're actually going to let me go out dressed in this?"

"Well, you're only being seen with me momentarily," Tony went over to the favoured silver audi "I just have to drop off my credit card,"

"Can't Happy do that?" Steve was getting very confused.

"No, and also, you're in a private room, you could walk in there in your American flag pyjamas for all they care," Tony hopped into the car "now chop chop, the surprise isn't going to wait much longer,"

Tony proceeded to zoom out of the garage while Happy held open the door for Steve. Hopping into the back of the car Steve let Happy drive him out towards the main section of the city.

"Do you know what's going on?" Steve asked to break the silence.

"I've been told to keep my lips sealed," Happy said as he turned swiftly around the corner, trying to stick on the tail of the silver car.

Leaning back into the leather seats Steve watched as they stopped outside a rather fancy looking place. Tony had just moved past a valet and towards the Royce.

Waving Steve into the restaurant the server gave a surprised look before rushing to lead them towards the back of the room. The whole restaurant seemed to stare at them as they passed and Steve suddenly felt very self conscious in his worn leather jacket, khaki pants and plaid shirt.

The door was opened for the room and Tony moved in smoothly.

"I hope we didn't keep you waiting to long, Miss Carter," Tony said as he entered the room.

Hearing the name Steve froze. Was it possible? Was it really Peggy? Tony blocked his view of the lady, but his heart still did little flips.

"Not at all, Mr Stark," Peggy's voice, withered slightly by age was still recognisable "it's a pleasure to finally meet you, you look just like Howard,"

"I suppose I should get going," Tony straightened up and pulled out a credit card "use it all you want, Happy will take you anywhere you want to go, have fun,"

Tony finally stepped aside and Steve finally got to have a look at his withered love. Age had made her face wrinkly, her hair grey but nothing had changed her eyes, those sweet, eyes.

Tony left the room with a wink and Steve didn't know what to do.

"You haven't aged a day," Peggy smiled at him as he sat.

"And look as perfect as ever," Steve replied honestly, ignoring the severs as they poured waters and placed menus in front of them "how did Tony find you? Even S.H.E.I.L.D couldn't manage to find you,"

"I moved to England after the war finished, and I eventually remarried. My name changed and I guess I slipped off the American radar. Tony contacted me a week ago saying he could get me here to see you…" the elder woman gave a heavy sigh "it is so good to see you again Steve. When I watched the news and saw you, I nearly had a heart attack,"

Steve would never be able to repay Tony for this night. After a fabulous meal the pair had Happy drive them down to a deserted beach where they stood by the waters edge. Ever since he had first woken up he had wanted to see Peggy, to touch her, to tell her how he _truly _felt, and now he had that chance.

So under the moonlight, with the sea gently lapping against the sand in its never ending game, Steve and Peggy finished the date that he had promised her over seventy years ago, back when the cities where smaller, life was simpler, and people seemed a hell of a lot more normal.

**I couldn't help but add that last part onto the finish.**


	8. Gamma & Glitter

**Gamma & Glitter **

As per medical reasoning Tony had to make sure no nasty fluids or bacteria. There usually was a bit of discharge from the reactor along with small grains of sand and dirt that could cause problems if they entered the main body. The arc reactor itself also had to be cleaned and the parts checked, sure, he wasn't going into cardiac arrest or having shrapnel sending into his heart, but it didn't hurt to check.

He had also chosen today for a different reason, he hoped that the sight of him playing around with his life line would deter certain others from bothering (most likely slaughtering) him. So he sat in the medical bay he had built during the repairs (he grew sick of Pepper bothering him to go to the hospital).

Unclicking it from his chest he held the warm object in his hand, looking in surprise at the amount of smelly discharge. With the new core discharge was rare, but he guessed he hadn't cleaned it out in two months, being to busy with the repairs on the tower and all. Holding it in his left hand he grabbed the suction drain and gently manoeuvred around all the bits, before letting it drop onto the metal tray.

He could really use Pepper's small hands at the moment, he manoeuvred a sterile clothe into the hole in his chest and began going to work, making sure not a single grain of dirt remained. The Arc Reactor itself had survived without damage.

"Anthony Stark!" The angry call of Hawkeye echoed down the hall and Tony quickly began feeding the exposed wires back into his chest.

The door burst open and a very angry, red and gold covered Hawkeye entered the room, bow in his hands and quiver on his back. Tony smiled his usual sheepish smile up at the man, whose eyes landed momentarily on the glowing Arc Reactor.

"You think this is funny?" Clint asked as wiped the red and gold glitter from his face.

"In all honesty, yes," Tony replied smile widening "you look like a fairy,"

"What if we had a mission?" Clint countered "out of weight arrows that exploded with _glitter _on impact?"

"We would could finish them while they where laughing," Tony countered as he hefted the Arc Reactor a little higher "now if you don't mind, I'm trying to work,"

"Stark!"

Tony smiled thinly as he swung his legs over the edge of the bed, deciding it wasn't such a good idea to remain venerable. Clicking the Arc Reactor in he stood to face the incoming hell.

"Where are my guns?" Natasha Romanoff came into the room, surprise flickering in her eyes as she spotted her partner "what happened to you?"

"Stark," Clint growled out.

"Where are my guns?" Natasha repeated after a moments silence.

"EBay," Tony slipped on a shirt before disinfecting his hands. Dum-e began rolling the tray away. Puling out his phone, he tapped on the screen, bringing up an ever changing eBay betting screen.

_Real and authenticated Black Widow guns_- read the title, along with pictures of the guns. The numbers kept on rising, and it seemed they where up to 2,000 already.

"Ebay?" Natasha replied with a growl. "they have my fingerprints and DNA"

"Swiped clean," Tony began trying to slide out of the room, but the glittering Clint blocked his way "come on Clint, Natasha, you know you deserved it,"

"What did we do?"

"I found my poptarts," Tony replied almost icily "and video feeds,"

The multi-coloured Clint seemed unimpressed as he stood stoic in the doorway. Natasha covered the other exit in the room. Tony, who had been prepared for this, quickly shut off the betting screen and folded his own arms over his chest.

"I want my guns back," Natasha stated coldly.

"Place a bet," Tony shrugged "and the glitters easy to wash out,"

"That's not the point," Clint's biceps tightened with strain.

"Suppose not-"

"Sir, Captain Rogers is requesting your presence in the foyer," Tony let out a small smile.

Squeezing between the wall and Clint he ended up on the other side with glitter covering his clothes. Walking calmly down the hall he wiped the glitter from himself before pushing on the Arc Reactor, making sure it was perfectly in place.

"Enjoy the night out Cap?" Tony asked as he entered the foyer "I'm guessing yes,"

"I don't know how I can thank you," the blonde said honestly "last night was amazing,"

Grimacing Tony leant on the wall, looking around in case the spies decided to plot revenge.

"Well, she's heading back to England today on the jet, you could show her out. Usually that's what people do, you know," Tony shrugged "Happy's actually picking her up at three, I'll have him swing around,"

"This is one of the nicest things anyone has ever done,"

"No emotional stuff, Capsicle," Tony frowned slightly "just a thank you would be enough,"

"I'll be in the gym then," Steve turned on his heel but paused for a moment "why are you covered in glitter?"

"Long story-"

A _twang _broke through the air and Tony looked down the hall to see an arrow racing his way, Steve was to surprised to try and stop it, and soon Tony was hit right next to his reactor, gold and red glitter flying.

Coughing he tried to clear his view. The end result wasn't good, he was covered in glitter, and his chest ached from where the arrow had hit. Clint seemed to have another one knocked because the Captain stood between the pair.

"Whatever it is, finish it now," He spoke as though he was trying to remain serious.

"I'm trying to," Clint fired another arrow that bent around the Captain and would've hit Tony but he ducked and the arrow flew straight into a newly arrived Bruce, who stumbled back surprise, coughing at the glitter.

"Shit," Clint muttered.

"Care to explain?" Bruce asked as he managed to get a glitter free breath in.

"Clint's fault!" Tony cheered as he skidded around the Captain and began going towards the lab "it would be a good idea to Hulk out right now,"

Tony bounded down the hall and left the glitter covered pair. Thor though came walking through with Jane close by his side, eyes landing on the glitter.

"Is this some strange sort of tradition?" He questioned as the looked at Clint.

"I'm going to reweight my arrows," he growled as he shifted past towards his room.

"I'm going to shut down Ebay," Natasha said in the same manner as she charged towards Tony's office.

"I think Tony finally got revenge for his missing poptarts," Bruce began walking towards his room.

"So the poptarts have been found! Let us feast!" Thor boomed as he took Janes hand and began pulling her towards the kitchen.

"What just happened?" Steve asked the empty foyer in confusion.

*_*AV*_*

"Sign here," Pepper pointed towards a place on the page and Tony skilfully signed with one hand, while the other changed the TV channels "initial here," he initialised and Pepper pulled out more papers "initials, signature, and then signature again,"

"Aren't you going to read those?" Steve asked as he looked up from his drawing pad.

"No," Tony stopped on some race, and upon closer inspection Bruce found Tony's company car was speeding around the track "that's what Pepper's for,"

"It's true," Pepper shrugged as she closed the clip board "the papers will be done in the morning, you have a meeting at nine o'clock and another at three,"

"Aren't you staying?" Tony gazed away from the TV for a moment "come on Peps!"

"I have to stay late at the office," they kissed briefly "don't forget that email to the Air Force,"

Tony just turned back towards the TV with a shrug, eyes trailing lightly over Peppers behind as she exited. With a sigh he sunk into the cushions and took a sip of his scotch.

"Man of Iron, when shall dinner be arriving?" Thor boomed as he entered the room, the ever present Jane by his side "I require a good feeding,"

"Do I look like a servant? Order something in," Tony said in return as he watched the Stark Industries car zoom past the others.

"Jarvis, would you mind ordering in the usual pizza's?" Steve questioned the A.I

"Of course not, Captain Rogers," Jarvis replied calmly.

"At least the Cap has some brains," Tony rolled his eyes as he finished his glass and stood for another "oh, Bruce, you're surprise is ready. You've got a meeting at nine,"

"I thought you had a meeting at nine," Bruce questioned.

"You're coming as well," Tony sat calmly and watched the screen "wear something nice. It's the board of directors, and they are a bloody pains in the arse,"

"Board of directors?" Bruce questioned astounded.

"They want to check you out,"

"Check me out?"

"Are you just going to repeat everything I say?" Tony questioned with a smirk "_Stark International _is opening up a Gamma Radiation department in the New York branch. I've elected you as head researcher. You can thank me now if you want,"

"Head researcher isn't exactly a stress free environment, Tony," Bruce frowned slightly.

"Come on Bruce! The other guy is fine with it, and plus, imagine all the ladies," Tony wiggled his eye brows.

"I don't think I can take it, Tony,"

"You'd be helping people! Healing the sick, finding a cure for cancer and all that jazz." Tony pointed out "and pay is really good, trust me, I would know,"

"Tony-"

"Do you know how much paper work I had to do," Tony raised an eyebrow "Pepper had to argue with the board for a week just to get the department cleared. Then there's hiring, building, payments, government clearance to deal with nuclear stuff. You wouldn't do that to your science brother, would you?"

"It's a nice thought-"

"Pepper's in the office right now. I'm getting cock blocked because of you-"

"Tony!" Steve cut the man off.

"You own a cock?" Thor asked.

"-come on Bruce!" Tony seemed unaffected.

"I have seen no roosters," Thor continued but Jane quickly whispered what it really was and Thor chuckled.

"I'll think about it, Tony," Bruce stood and rubbed the bridge of his nose.


	9. TT

**Tremendous Tony**

Tony gazed at his watch as he leant against the Rolls-Royce, Happy waiting besides him, flicking through a magazine. It was nearing 8:30 and it seemed Bruce would be a no show. The billionaire had to admit he wasn't that surprised, he had after all had a second in line choice, Betty Ross, who seemed more then willing to take the job.

"Sorry, Thor set the toaster on fire," was all Bruce offered as he walked out of the house, dressed in a typical college professor tweed jacket over his usual ensemble.

Happy tucked his magazine under his arm and opened the door for the pair of genius' that entered without delay.

"Knew you couldn't turn me down," Tony smiled brightly as he sent a quick text to Pepper.

Bruce resisted a role of his eyes as he looked at the perfect polished wood of the door. He had stayed up late thinking about it, whether or not he should even consider taking the job. Tony had obviously put a lot of work into it, and maybe it wouldn't be so hard, after all, it was what he had done at the university, only on a bigger scale.

"How do these things go?" Bruce questioned.

"Well, you'll have to wait outside while we do normal board meeting stuff-" Tony looked out the window at a donut store "-Happy, drive through please,"

Happy swerved into the drive through donut place and put in the orders while Tony continued "then you come in, they'll have already read the basics in the cut down, and they'll just ask you questions, shake hands," Bruce took the box of donuts and coffees from Happy "that's what Pepper tells me at least, I'm asleep half the time,"

"She lets you sleep through board meetings?" Bruce questioned, knowing how strict the red headed secretary could be at times.

"I'm pretty good at faking paying attention," Tony bit down into a powdered donut "had to do it so many times. Donut?" he held out the box and Bruce shook his head.

Happy exited off the main road and began going into the industrial districts where the main branch of _Stark Industries _building took place. The campus was large and had numerous security checks that they had to pass through, but eventually they pulled in front of the large, modern looking office building.

Happy opened the door with ease and the two piled out, Tony still nursing his coffee and a box of donuts. Upon entering the brunette secretary quickly explained what room the meeting was in, while she eyed Bruce with interest.

Tony took up his second donut as they entered the floor. Outside a large wooden door was a set of seats and Tony gestured to one, donut still in hand.

"Sit there, you'll be called in soon," Tony opened the door with his elbow "wish me luck,"

Inside the usual board members where waiting, Pepper at one of the heads of the table, stacks of different papers in front of her.

"Donut?" Tony offered as he entered, dropping the box between the director of shares and director of press.

He took up a seat in his swivel chair at the head of the table where the usual pile of papers waited. Stock reviews, hazards, ideas, all the usual stuff that he barely bothered to read.

"Perhaps we can start the meeting with the latest stock market reviews," Pepper suggested smoothly, glaring shortly at Tony as he sucked the powdered sugar off his fingers.

Tony long ago, during the times when his father was still alive, had learnt how to fake interest. Sleeping during board meetings never ended up well, so he focused on a point just behind the person talking's head, and began going through plans of his latest idea. At the moment he was trying to figure out how to increase the metal durability of his suit.

"Hey, chuck me the donuts," Tony said to some random member who seemed uncertain as he slid the box of donuts Tony's way.

He was eying a chocolate glazed donut when Bruce came in, looking amazingly at ease. Flashing a smile he bit into the donut, holding it in his mouth, and gave a thumbs up to his friend.

"Dr Bruce Banner, as you have already read, has shown he is more then capable of running the new Radiation Department of _Stark Industries_," Pepper gestured for everyone to open the large booklet on Bruce that contained his latest thesis paper and records.

"Dr Banner, what makes _you _think you're capable for the job?" Questioned some board member Tony had knick named 'Beard Face' at their first meeting.

Bruce seemed to take it all in his stride as he calmly stated numerous reasons for him to have the job, all the while Tony was gazing out the window, having heard it all before.

"But what of your…condition?" Questioned another man who Tony had labelled 'Pimple Pony' because of his horse shaped head and acne scars.

"It will not be a problem, I have it well under control," Bruce didn't seem at all surprised by the question.

"It says here you destroyed Harlem," Beard Face said.

"Everyones permitted a temper tantrum now and then," Tony said as he glared lightly at the bearded man.

"Such temper tantrums can cost thousands in damages," Pimple Pony added.

"It's not like its coming out of your paycheck," Tony snorted.

"Stocks might drop," added another.

"Two members of the Avengers working to find a cure for cancer and make the best form of clean energy in existence will certainly not make the stocks drop," Tony said as he folded his arms behind his head.

"Fangirls are not the ones buying the stocks, Mr Stark," Mr Bowers said.

"I say he's hired," Tony swung around in his chair.

"I think what Mr Stark is trying to say is that not only will Dr Banner's presence increase our popularity with people in all fields it will also improve our research margins dramatically," Pepper cut in, trying to keep the board on track "I'm all for it,"

"Two against twelve, we win," Tony stood with a flourish, perfecting his suit. He grabbed the needed papers and gave them to a confused banner "Signature, signature, initials and signature again," he handed his friend a pen.

"Mr Stark this is a board agreement, you do not make the agreements for this company," Pimple Pny said.

"What's the name of this company again?" Tony folded his arms over his chest.

"_Stark Intenational_" A random board member said.

"Stark. My name is Tony Stark, right?" Everyone but Pepper seemed a bit confused "my dad run this company until his unfortunate demise, and I've been running it since I was twenty one. Really you guys are just here for show. I know Banner will do fine here, and if you agree or not, he's hired"

His friend hesitantly did the needed sigantures where needed and Tony took the papers off him and chucked them in front of the legal department.

"You can take care of those right, Tim?" He questioned.

"It's Henry," The man corrected.

"Same difference," Tony skidded past Pepper who was looking slightly amused and murderous at the same time "Ms Potts, schedule a press conference at two, and cancel the three o'clock meeting please,"

Tony pushed open the door and gestured to Bruce who hesitantly left, offering his out of place goodbyes. Outside the room Tony loosened his tie and looked at his watch.

"We're clear for the day, and we need to hide from Pepper," Happy started up the car as they came outside.

"Thanks back there," Bruce hopped into the car.

"I hate racists," Tony looked outside the window "it's horrible how they descrimate against you just because you're green,"

"I don't think that's why, Tony," Bruce rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Well maybe you did break Harlem," Tony shrugged "just a tiny bit,"

"So that's it, I have the job because you said so?" Bruce would never understand the workings of business.

"You signed the papers. Of course the building won't be done for a year so you'll have to keep mooching off me,"

As they pulled up to the mansion some time later Tony frowned slightly as he gazed at the building.

"What's wrong?" Bruce questioned, watching as Happy began driving the car down to the garage.

"Nothing," Tony shook his head and pushed open the door. Steve was inside drawing something into his book while Thor boomed loudly to Jane about something. Clint glared at Tony who just smirked back.

"You have a little bit of glitter right there," He gestured to Clint's eyebrow and the master archer wiped away the offending piece of sparkle angrily.

"You do realise they probably have some sort of master revenge planned, right?" Bruce followed Tony down the stairs to the lab. Punching in the code Tony went to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of chilled water, chucking one to Bruce.

"Yeah," Tony stripped off his jacket, tie and shirt, leaving him in a dark shirt that he wore to hide the arc reactor.

He moved towards his new piece of free time work, an Ashton Martin that he had brought privately at a car auction. With a ruined engine and wiring the thing was on its way to be used as scrap metal, but luckily Tony had saved it.

"Bring up the engine for me Jarvis," Tony ordered the A.I and the engine popped up. After separating the parts Tony gazed at a piece of folded over metal that seemed to be jammed between the cylinders. "Hand me the wrench, would you?"

Bruce picked up the tool and handed it to Tony, asking the question that had been on his mind for a while.

"Why are you getting everyone gifts?" Tony began digging around in the engine.

"I'm just that nice," Tony grunted as he chucked out a random piece of metal "whoever treated this car so badly deserves to have a knife shoved up their-"

There was a short explosion and Tony stumbled back a step in surprise, his face, shirt, arms and part of his pants now covered in a vibrant pink paint. He coughed out a mixture of spit and paint and he wiped his arms across his eyes in attempt to see.

"Are you okay?" Bruce asked as he offered a rag to his friend, who began wiping himself down.

Tony managed to clear some of the paint off his face before answering "I am going to kill them," he gazed at the engine before moving over to his computer and bringing up his emails.

Wiping his hands he began to type furiously, clicking in numerous attachments along the way. Bruce read over his shoulder and eyes widened in surprise.

"You wouldn't," he breathed "they'll kill you,"

"They just shot me with pink paint," Tony countered, tapping furiously before clicking send "I'm going to go have a shower, breath this to anyone, and I'll kill you, hulk or no hulk,"

"I'm staying neutral," Bruce stepped back and let his pink friend past "but it's your life,"


	10. Spy Love

**Dinner & Dunces**

All the males lounged in the largest and main lounge room of the house, looking out at the setting sun over the Malibu waters. All dressed in nearly matching bow ties suits (except for Thor) they where waiting for their various acquaintances and dates to come down from their various rooms.

"Hey Boss," Happy entered the room, wearing his own bow tie suit "the cars are out the front when you want to go,"

"Cars?" Steve questioned.

"Yeah, I drive myself to these things," Tony ran a hand over his gelled hair.

"And I usually end up driving you home," Pepper said as she came into the room, looking gorgeous in the pearl dress and perfectly straightened hair "the others will be down in a minute,"

"That dress looks hot," Tony pulled her into his lap.

"Just the dress?" Pepper questioned.

"Depends-"

"Jane, you look as radiant as Lady Sif after a battle!" Thor roared, cutting off most likely would have been a very dirty reference by Tony.

"Um, thanks?" Replied the scientist awkwardly. She truly did look radiant in the form fitting red dress that enhanced her cleavage and made her hips sway in a dangerous way. Her brown hair was pinned up into an intricate hairstyle

Natasha appeared behind Jane, the simple black dress looking strikingly deadly on her well shaped form. Tony leaned over towards a shell shocked Clint and whispered;

"You're drooling," and the spy quickly shut his mouth.

"Are we going to go or are we just going to spend the night here?" Asked the red headed Russian spy as she clicked shut her clutch, pistol no doubt inside.

"Start up the car, Hap," Tony stood, beginning to walk out of the room and into the foyer, dress shoes clicking on the tiles.

The driver quickly left to start up the limo while Tony held open the door of the Audi for Pepper, who sat down graciously inside. Tony hopped into the front seat and started up the rumbling engine.

"See you there," He spoke before roaring down the driveway hood goin up as he went. Inside the car the music was low and Pepper was adjusting her lip gloss in the mirror, despite the fact she looked perfect.

Soon as they neared the venue traffic became worse as police roadblocks came up. Usually the security was lazier, but it seemed news of the Avengers presence at the venue had spread over the social media and hundreds of fans where expected to come out to see them.

At the sight of Tony they just let him straight through, and letting the top drop back down, the billionaire pulled into the circular valet parking, girls screaming at the sight.

"This whole Avenger thing doesn't seem to be to bad for business," Tony said to Pepper after he'd opened the door for her.

"Or your fanbase," Pepper replied with a smile as she gazed across the sea of faces "biggest turn out so far,"

"Photo," Tony turned quickly to face a photographer that eagerly snapped up their picture "I trust it'll only get bigger,"

The screaming became louder as they limo pulled up, Happy opening the door for the couples himself. Thor stepped out first, armour glinting sharply in the bright flash of cameras. Holding a hand for his brunette beauty Jane stepped out hesitantly, seemingly surprised by the turn out.

Steve came out next, and after a quick fix of his suit (to hide his own surprise no doubt) he smiled wildly at the crowd and began making his way up to where Tony was talking to a report. Along the way various autograph booklets where pushed his and Thors way, and they all signed, Thor having been taught how by Tony.

Clint came out and offered an arm to Natasha who took with a smile so small it was almost unnoticeable. The pair of assassins didn't sign anything as they walked down the centre of the red carpet, in fact, they didn't seem to pay any attention to their adoring fans that held up signs like '_Hawkeye pierced my heart!' _and _'Bend over Black Widow!'_

Bruce surprisingly got an appreciative crowd yell as he exited, and numerous signs could be in the crowd, including _'Hulk can smash me any day!'_ Bruce even signed a couple of autographs and shook a couple of hands.

"How about a group photo?" Called out one photographer and the others seemed to agree as they cheered in agreement.

"You heard the people," Tony wrapped an arm around Peppers waste and jerked a head to Bruce who came and stood beside him, various other Avengers squeezing into the frame. After various shots the group headed inside the hall where the guests where milling around.

"Great to see you again Mr Stark," one man stepped forward.

"Robert Green," Pepper whispered calmly into Tony's ear.

"Good to see you again Robert," they shook hands "how's that wife of yours?"

It was unsurprising that Tony and Pepper where whisked away into the crowds, it was after all Tony's benefit. Bruce soon found himself swamped by various people that wanted to know about how he was going to make history with the new Stark Department.

The other Avengers just sat the assigned table, numerous people coming up to 'thank them yet again for saving New York,'. Steve as nice as ever shook their hands and gave them beaming smiles, while the master assassins just shook their hands. Thor seemed slightly avoided by the crowds for some reason, but seeing as he was a hulking bunch of muscle, they had a right to be a bit uncertain.

Tony soon appeared on the staged podium, glass of scotch in hand. Resting against the polished glass he glanced at the changing slide shows behind him, including one of him falling out of the sky after flying in the nuke.

"Those are seriously the best photos we have?" he asked with a comical snort and the crowd chuckled lightly. A photo of Thor being smashed into a building came up and he said "that's better. I'm sure you know why you're all here. It's the time of year again where we have to fork out all our hard earned money, but I suppose this year is a little more interesting. It's not everyday that aliens attack New York, costing billions in damages. So lets just fork over some of our money, have a couple of drinks, and enjoy all this night has to offer,"

The crowd cheered and clapped politely. Food soon began coming out and Tony and Pepper ventured back to the table, sitting down with gracious sighs.

"Here Cap," Tony slid his drink across the table the man "you'll need it,"

"I'm fine, thank you," Captain slipped it back and Tony shrugged as he finished the glass himself.

"You just sit here and drink all night?" Clint questioned as he nursed his own drink.

"You sound surprised," Tony looked at his glass.

Tony in the end was sober enough to have a couple of photos taken on their exit along with some autographs for some screaming fan girls. The Audi was going to be driven back by Happy later the next morning because Pepper refused to even let him get the keys off the valet.

"I'm not drunk," Tony said as he entered the limo.

"I know you're not," Pepper replied as she sat next to him.

"Maybe a little bit," Tony made a little mini gesture with his fingers.

"I know, Tony," Pepper patted his leg.

!_!_!_!_!**A Week Later**!_!_!_!

"_And now we go to the event everyone's talking about!_" Joanne Rivers proclaimed from the TV where Jane was sitting. _"Black Widow attended the event in a form fitting Gucci gown. I don't know about you George, but she can tear my head off and eat my insides anyday,"_

Jane laughed lightly at the comment but it died in her throat as she saw a very determined Black Widow storm across the hall behind her.

"Jarvis, where's Stark?" She questioned as she passed.

"In his office with Dr Banner, Agent Romanoff." Jarvis replied.

The agent didn't waste any time heading towards the office, dragging an unfortunate Clint behind her (he had unfortunately been found in the halls).

"Care to explain?" Natasha asked as she threw the magazine on the table between the pair of men that seemed to be going over a pile of paper work.

"That is a magazine," Tony stated as he pulled some paper work out from underneath it "now if you don't mind, I actually have to get these done,"

Natasha grabbed the magazine and opened to the nearly crumpled page; "read that,"

"You want me to read the fashion reviews?" Tony didn't even look up from the paper work he was reading.

Clint took the magazine off her and his face seemed to fold in on its self as he read what was written. Bruce took it and read what it said.

"_Forget Brad and Angelina! We're all over the Avenger couples! With previously only one couple confirmed, that of Pepper Potts and Tony Stark, we now give you the exclusive new couples are on the block, the juicy Thor and the Scientist Jane Foster. But one couple has caught our main attention, Black Widow and Hawkeye! _

_Could this bird be tangled in a spiders web? The latest snaps and gossip from the Stark International Benefit Dinner says yes! The couple have been seen together, walking the red carpet, looking like they didn't have a care in the world._

'_Since they're staying at my house I've gotten a better look at the pair of them' said Tony Stark in an exclusive interview 'they'll roam the grounds together, go out together, practicality do everything together. I mean come on, even I can tell when people have the hots for one another,'"_

He chucked it to Tony who finally took it and read it.

"You did this interview?" Bruce asked.

"Obviously," Tony rolled his eyes before chucking the magazine away.

"This could compromise us," Natasha folded her arms over her chest "you've taken it to far,"

"I doubt evil villains and aliens read gossip magazines, Tash," Tony smirked at her.

"That's not the point," Clint also folded his arms over his chest.

"Everyone knows about Pepper and I and no ones gone after her. And I'm a billionaire! I'd have enough money to pay whatever ransom they asked for," Tony tapped his pen against his chest "besides you deserve it. I had to dismantle the engine completely and clean each piece one by one,"

"So you didn't do it for the money?"

"What part of billionaire don't you understand?" Tony frowned "besides, I gave all the money to charity,"

"I'll get you back for this," Natasha vowed before swearing something in Russian.

"Russian is such a beautiful language," Tony commented with a small smile as he watched Natasha and Clint leave.

Natasha on her way out dropped the magazine in the bin in her huff and began walking the grounds.

"He's an idiot," Natasha stated.

"Isn't he always?" Clint responded lightly.

"Doesn't he know this could compromise us both?"

"There isn't a rule against people dating in S.H.E.I.L.D, Natasha," Clint responded almost to dryly.

"Doesn't mean he can just go spreading rumours," the red head stopped shy of the cliff edge.

The pair remained silent for a moment as they looked out across the blue ocean.

"Can I tell you something?" Clint asked after a while, not taking his eyes off the water.

"You can tell me anything, Clint," Natasha responded almost instantly.

Clint was silent for a moment more before saying; "what if we made the rumour true?"

"Us dating?" Natasha asked, fighting the heat rising up in her cheeks.

"Ever since Budapest I've been having feelings for you that might become compromising in the wrong situations,"

It lacked the light, sarcastic wit that usually came with his statements, Natasha noticed. Crossing her arms a little tighter she gazed at her partner and friend of so many years.

"I've been having them since Iran," she stated in the same manner.

"So long?"

"As you said, they can become compromising in the wrong situation," she repeated, brushing a strand of crimson hair out of her face.

"How many times do you think we'll be forced into a wrong situation?" Clint asked.

"Knowing our luck, pretty soon,"

"Then why wait?" Clint asked, and before waiting for an answer he leant in and kissed her on her lips, hand coming up to cup her soft cheek.

For a moment she froze, but then she moved into it, kissing him back. Her sweet smell of roses and apples engulfed him and he realised how much he loved that sent. Her lip balm tasted tropical and her hair was soft under his touch. How long had he waited for this? How long had he denied himself these feelings?

"Compromised my arse," he breathed.

**I hope you like it! It was so hard to get spy love right! I wanted to keep them in character, I really hope I did.**


	11. PTSD

**If you haven't noticed Tony is my favourite character (when isn't he?) and I know it kinda focus' on Tony a bit, but it's more like character exploration. Also, I'm not an expert on PTSD, so all the facts might be wrong. I don't know if I've mentioned previously who knows about what happened in Afghanistan, but if I have, please ignore it.**

**PTSD **

Tony swore if Pepper wasn't so cute, hot, and fantastic he would have fired her on the spot. He wondered if maybe the stress of being a CEO had made her insane. Maybe she had suffered a mental break down. A triple date with master assassins and a demigod? If that wasn't insane, he didn't know what was.

"Tony, put the phone away," Pepper hissed at him and he sent her a playful glare before putting the phone into his pocket.

"I'm bored," Tony stated, glaring at the other table that held the super spies. Clint must've been pulling out all the stocks because Natasha was actually smiling. Not like an 'I'm going to enjoy killing you smile' but more like a true happy smile.

"You don't even have to talk to them," Pepper replied.

"It was just supposed to be us," Tony grumbled "private room, candles, romantic music…."

"And I'm sure it would've been great," Pepper gently placed a hand on his "but this whole expedition is team building, not just a long booty call,"

"You're not even home long enough to have a booty call. And Captain Grumps can hear through the walls…" Tony frowned deeply "he can't hear in the garage though-"

"Not here Tony," Pepper blushed deeply.

"You're so cute when you're embarrassed," he stroked her flaming cheeks.

Pepper blushed deeper and smiled a bright smile at him. The entrees where placed in front of them and separated for the moment, beginning to eat. But with a grunt Tony turned to the left, towards Thors table.

"Not the whole restaurant needs to hear how you defeated the giants," Thor didn't seem even slightly embarrassed.

"But it is a mighty tale!-"

"Thor, just try to keep your voice down," Jane cut in with a sheepish smile, drawing the gods attention back.

Turning back to his meal Tony had just about taken his first bite, when he was suddenly flung to the ground, the sound of a shot raining through the air. After he managed to get his breath back he gazed up at Natasha.

"As flattered as I am, I think birdbrain would kill me," he stated with a smirk.

"Get your suit," Natasha growled at him, rolling off him and reaching for her holster.

Pulling out his phone he quickly pressed an emergency signal for Happy, before rolling behind a newly upturned table.

"Thor, get all the civilians out of here," Tony yelled at the man "then get my suit off Happy!"

The thunder god complied as he smashed a hole in the wall for people to climb through. Pepper bit her lip and didn't move.

"Pepper, go," Tony said to her, kissing her lightly "I'll be fine,"

"I've heard that before," Pepper said before scurrying out.

Shots where firing above them, the sound of an arrow string being constantly redrawn was the most piercing of all. Tony dared to look over the upturned table, and he spotted Natasha and Clint back to back, shooting off numerous assailants armed with all different types of weapons.

It seemed though time suddenly slowed down. Tony heard a sharp whistle, followed by a heavy swear from Clint. A man appeared in the hole in the wall, his own gun in his hands. Tony had dealt in weapons for a long time and he knew what that was.

Stark Issue 2007 model grenade launcher.

"Get down!" Tony yelled to the pair of assassins, who spared a glance his way before diving for cover.

If it was a movie they would've played some over dramatic slow music as debris shattered everywhere. The explosion rocked the restaurant, and the main man didn't seem to car for his own men. Tony was rocketed across the room and he landed hard against one of the decorative rocks, brick and dry wall raining down on him.

_He was sitting was his back against the rock, fingers fumbling on the keys of his phone. Come on! He had to get help! _

Shaking himself from the sudden flash back Tony growled under his breath.

_The missile landed in the sand a little distant away. He knew what it was. How could he not? He had designed it after all. A new wave of panic rolled in as he-_

"Man of Iron!" He heard Thor roar.

Half the restaurant lay in smoking ruins. The other half, the half he was in, was half alight. Tony scrambled to his feet, feeling blood run down his temple. Coughing through the smoke he tried to find a way out. The smoke was thick though, and it seemed power outside on the street had been cut, or had the street lights been ruined in the blast? He didn't know.

Ripping open his shirt he let the light of his Arc Reactor guide his way. The smoke was getting thinner, but the remains of the restaurant began groaning.

Sensing someone behind him he turned, preparing to fight. Tony had to admit he wasn't that surprised to find the man that had fired the rocket launcher. He began attempting to rain blows down on Tony, but the billionaire knew better then to just let the man beat him into submission. Using his self defence and boxing skills he had developed over the years, Tony found it was a near even fight.

Suddenly the building let out one last mighty groan, and gave into it's fate. Beams, bricks and pieces of various sky lights and wood rained down on the pair, and Tony barely managed to roll away from a large beam of wood.

Tony kept on running, trying to avoid the debris. A large splinter scraped across his back, and he felt the crimson life source begin to flow.

_The man who he had just taken a photo with slumped to the ground as the body pierced his body as quickly and smoothly as a knife cut through butter._

Tony stumbled out onto the street where the restaurant goers where being held back by a newly arrived police line. Thor could be seen coming out of the remains too, ashy golden and silver case in his hand.

"Tony," Pepper moved away from a medic that was disinfecting a cut on her arm and wrapped Tony in a hug, arms rubbing into the still bleeding cut.

"_What did you do to me?"_

"_I saved your life,"_

Pepper released him when she felt the blood sticking to her arms. Looking at it she let out a loud gasp.

"You need to see a medic!" she took his arm and began leading him towards an ambulance.

S.H.E.I.L.D trucks pulled up though, and Tony opted to go to their medics. It was a quick clean, the cut wasn't deep enough to need stitches but would be painful as it healed. The cut on his head needed two stitches, and thankfully he got off without a concussion.

"Anyone care to explain what the fuck just happened?" Fury said once Tony made it over to where the newly assembled Avengers waited.

As Natasha and Clint explained Tony sat close to Pepper. He knew he wouldn't be sleeping tonight, he could feel the shadows of the memories lurking in the deepest part of his brain. Ever since Afghanistan he had kept those memories under lock and key, but occasionally some would break through, causing him to stay awake, trying to find something to keep his over active mind busy.

"I want a full report on my desk by Monday," Fury stated before walking away towards the agents that where pulling the leader out of the wreckage.

Happy pulled up the car and everyone piled in. Tony gazed out the window, knowing his plans with Pepper tonight would be put on hold. It would be the usual. She would ask him what was wrong while he downed a glass of scotch, he would act like it was nothing, she would go to bed, and he would stay up all night building pointless things.

"_Did you see that? Those are YOUR weapons... in the hands of those murderers! Is this what you want? Is this what you wish the legacy of the great Tony Stark to be?"_

Walking into the house he was greeted by a mother henning Captain and an anxious looking Hulk. It didn't take much to brush them off. Chucking his ruined jacket and dress shirt in the bin he wore his tattered singlet as he poured himself some scotch.

"I don't think you should be drinking," the Captain gave him a look as Tony re-entered the main living room.

Tony just shrugged and finished the glass cleanly. He left again and passed by the door, bottle in hand.

"I'll be in the lab," he said before leaving, heading into his hide out.

Was he weak for hiding out in the garage? Was he weak for not being able to face those memories? He could deal with them most of the time, he had learnt to deal with swimming again, and usually he was fine with being blasted across places, it was after all kind of his job. But sometimes it just slipped, a crack appeared in the dam.

A year ago though, Tony had noticed it was only when he wasn't wearing the suit. When he wore the suit, he was fine, it was like nothing could get him, but without it….Without it he was just a man, a man who had never really dealt with the cards fate threw at him.

"I'm guessing you're not coming up," Pepper spoke from the doorway.

Pepper knew, hell, she was the one who had to wake him up from nightmares sometimes. It was rare for her to actually have to wake him up, when he knew he was going to have a nightmare, he just didn't sleep. She listened to him, she offered words of comfort about Yinsen, about the water torture, about everything. Sometimes though Tony had to deal with it in his own way.

"The Arc needs a new face plate," He replied numbly as he looked through his shirt at the scratched plate.

"I can stay if you want," Pepper looked at him with sorry eyes.

"The cot isn't that comfortable," Tony sipped on his drink.

"I can deal with it," Pepper stepped a little deeper into the room.

"I'll be fine Pep, I just have to-"

"Deal with it yourself," Pepper wrapped her arms around his shoulders "I know. Just try to get at least a little sleep,"

"No promises," he smiled before kissing her "I'll see you in the morning,"

"I have meetings," Pepper responded "Washington remember?"

"Right, I'll see you Tuesday,"

Pepper left not long after that. Tony downed his glass of scotch before stripping off his shirt and pulling out the reactor, going to work replacing the glass. Along his chest where numerous, almost invisible, scars. They where the ones few noticed, those where the entry points of the shrapnel.

With the Arc clicked back into his chest he sighed as he felt the same hum. It was low, and it could only be heard and felt at close distances. To Tony it faded into the background, he knew it was there, but he chose to ignore it. It was like that tinsy bit of static you would get on old radios.

Maybe it was meant to happen. The Arc Reactor had made him a new person. He hated who he used to be. The self absorbed prick that only cared for sex, alcohol and gambling. He would've never known how much of a traitor Stane was.

Tony knew he was weak. He couldn't even stand an explosion without turning to the bottle. What would Steve say? Why did he even care what Steve thought? Maybe because he was all his father used to talk about.

Sitting down on his cot he took one last mouthful from the bottle before laying down on the hard surface. He knew tomorrow he would act fine, he supposed his fellow Avengers wouldn't even care for his hangover, he had done it to himself after all.

Even a man of iron is allowed to let his dents show now and then.


	12. Cooking with Thor

**Cooking With Thor & Table Manner Class From Natasha**

"That was a black market weapons ring leader looking for the ultimate source of power," Steve relayed what information Fury had given him to the Avengers "going for your reactor"

Though the words where aimed at Tony, he was too busy nursing a hangover to notice. Glass of chlorophyll in hand he was sunk into the cushion on the lounge, playing with the rims of his sunglasses.

"Good to know," Tony grunted "can we leave the revenge mission for later though?"

"The directors already taken care of it, I'm just relaying what he told me," Steve chucked the file on the table.

"Is that all-"

Tony's phone began to ring and he answered it without even excusing himself. He seemed to wince slightly, and those in the lounge room could hear Pepper's angry voice.

"No more pity for me I take it," Tony stated once the yelling had stopped. He got a quizzical expression on his face, before it changed to confused, then surprised "those papers weren't due till next Friday….this Friday? Too bad for them,"

Clint shook his head before standing up to leave along with Natasha. Thor took Jane by the hand and began leading her towards the kitchen where apparently he was going to attempt to make lunch for everybody. Tony, not wanting his kitchen to be destroyed, had ordered Dum-e up so he could be ready with a fire extinguisher .

"So, what do you want to make Thor?" Jane asked as she leaned on the marble bench top.

"What is considered a delicacy on this planet?" Thor asked as his bulking frame disappeared into the cupboard.

"Pasta? I don't know Thor," Jane shrugged "I don't know what food Mr- Tony keeps in his house,"

"Just get Jarvis to call Happy for anything you need," the man in question said as he entered the kitchen and chucked his empty cup into the sink. He then stopped in front of Dum-e who was beeping happily in the corner. "Only spray if you see smoke, got it, or I'll make you into the most high tech pregnancy tests in history,"

The machine beeped in return and rotated it's claw.

"You can understand it?" Jane asked as she watched Thor place out some pasta sauce.

"Him," Tony corrected "and trust me, he doesn't have anything good to say,"

The machine beeped in what seemed anger, but a stern glare from Tony made it droop and beep sadly.

"Man of Iron we are making pasta!" Thor boomed cheerfully, holding out spaghetti noodles.

Tony rubbed his temples and frowned "what part of hungover don't you get?" he asked beginning out of the kitchen "keep the booming voice on low please, its like you speak thunder,"

"You are not the first one to tell me that," Thor said, voice considerably lower.

"Not surprised," the billionaire walked out of the kitchen but not before saying "Jarvis bring up the most basic spaghetti recipe you can find,"

A holographic screen popped up above the bench almost instantly, making Jane jump a little, still not completely used to the high tech workings of the Stark mansion.

"What else do we need?" Thor asked "I got these because they said pasta,"

"Mince, salts, garlic and pots,"

They managed to get everything out, and Jane began browning the mince and Thor began cutting up the onions and garlic.

"These vegetables, they make me cry," Thor said as he wiped his eyes with the back of his hand.

"You've never cut onions before?" Jane asked with a small smile as she watched Thor begin violently trying to rid the tears.

"Is it some sort of defence mechanism?" Thor held an onion at eye level "I do not like it,"

"It's just what they do," Jane wiped away one of the tears "never would've thought onions would be able to break through your defence,"

"Neither did I," Thor finished chopping them before brushing them to the side "does garlic contain any hidden defences?"

"They keep vampires away," Jane said with a chuckle.

"So they are good,"

Jane laughed freely as she grabbed the pasta sauce and began trying to get the lid off. "They're good," she began straining to attempt to open the jar.

"Allow me, fair lady," he took the jar of Jane and twisted the jar in his hands, using to much strength and breaking the glass, sending sauce and shards flying all over the kitchen.

Jane ducked but still managed to get a far amount on her. Thor got a full splatter to the face, while Dum-e beep indignantly as it landed on him. Thor began chuckling deeply as he set the two halves onto the bench. The loud bellowing laugh soon became contagious and Jane found herself bent over from the force of her laughing.

"Are you okay Jane?" Thor asked finally, grabbing a tea towel and beginning to dab away the sauce.

"Fine," Jane smiled as she took the towel off him and began wiping away the large amount of sauce that had gotten on him. "But I think we'll need some more sauce,"

"As do I," he gazed at the jar then back to Jane, large hand coming up to wipe away a splatter of sauce above her eyebrow.

Jane cupped her own hand on his cheek before going up on her tippy toes to kiss him on the lips. Thor kissed her back passionately, his two large hands cupping her cheeks. The kiss became even more passionate and Thor pushed Jane against the bench, while she braced herself.

Pulling away momentarily she asked "do you smell smoke?"

"Nay," he leaned back in to kiss her.

All the while the mince on the stock began to stick to the bottom of the pan, burning and smoking. Dum-e jumped at the action and readied the fire extinguisher, letting the white foam escape and douse the stove, also sending some of it onto the kissing couple.

"Oh my god," Jane pushed away from Thor "Dum-e, stop,"

The machine backed away almost immediately and hung its….head? Jane supposed it was a head.

"I don't think we can have pasta anymore," Jane gazed at the white foam mess on the stove, quickly shutting off the flame "Uh, Jarvis, where are the cleaning things?"

"Dum-e is more then capable of cleaning up this mess, Ms Foster," Jarvis replied "shall I order in a meal for lunch?"

"Yes, please," Jane flushed deeply.

"May I suggest you vacate the area until the food arrives?" Jarvis suggested.

"Let us hide on the balcony, the Man of Iron will be less then pleased,"

Dum-e was left to tidy up the kitchen, and when the food arrived Jane quickly gathered it before the others realised what was happening. Setting it down on the table and hiding all signs of the packaging she called the others down. Steve, Bruce, Clint and Natasha came straight away and didn't seem to notice that it was order in.

Tony was eventually almost dragged down Natasha. With papers in one hand and phone in the other (noticeably not his _Stark Tech, _but rather an _Iphone_) he sat down at the table and began signing papers with one hand, eating with the other, all the while talking on the phone.

"I know Pepper, tell them they can't have the plans," he spoke with a mouth half full of pasta.

"You'd think someone would've taught him table manners," Clint muttered as he looked at Tony.

"I heard that," Tony muttered "Listen, Peps, I don't care how much they're paying-"

Natasha stood up calmly and took the phone from Tony's grasp and put it to her ear.

"Tony's eating at the moment, he'll call you later," Hanging up she placed the phone in her pocket, then took the papers off Tony and chucked them on the kitchen bench.

"That's a multi million dollar contract," Tony moved to stand up to get it, but Natasha glared daggers at him.

"Someone needs to teach you table manners," Natasha sat back down and began twirling the pasta on her fork.

"Is that what they teach you when you become a spy, table manners?" Tony snorted and began digging around his pocket, pulling out his other phone, but Clint snatched it cleanly and swiftly out of hand. "You'll kill them if they use their salad fork for their entrées?"

"It's just polite Tony," Steve sighed.

He just grunted before beginning to wolf down his food, and in two minutes all that was left was an empty plate. Snatching the phone back off Clint he walked over to Natasha and held out his hand for his other one.

"Say thank you," Natasha glanced up at him.

"Thank you for that gloriously fabricated meal," Tony winked at Jane "all charges come up on my credit card,"

Jane blushed deeply and Natasha forked over the phone. Tony instantly dialled Pepper who sounded about ready to kill Natasha.

"_Spy or not she does not just go and hang up on me,"_ could be heard clearly through the speakers.

"Pepper, kill her later, what where you saying about Oscorp?" Tony walked out of the room, grabbing the papers on the way out.

"It was a good meal," Bruce stood up "Would you like help cleaning up?"

"No, it's good," Jane stood and began collecting plates.

They went into the kitchen and began filling the sink with soapy water. Bubbles foamed up and Jane began to wash while Thor dried.

They where near done when they where suddenly interrupted.

"Watch out!" Tony came skidding around the corner into the kitchen, Natasha hot on his tail, hair wet and looking very unlike its usual colour. Running around the island bench sitting area he stopped on the other side, mirroring each of the Black Widows moves.

"Friend Stark what did you do?" Thor asked with amusement.

"I may have possibly changed her shampoo," Natasha jumped over the bench and Tony barley managed to miss being kicked in the chest. "Possibly."

"I am going to kill you Stark," Tony jumped up onto the table and ran over to the other side, doing his best to avoid the spy.

"I've heard that before," he mocked as he ran out of the room and right into Clint "I'm going to die,"

He attempted to skid around Clint, but the archer grabbed the scuff of his shirt and pulled him back. Natasha came quickly, and Clint couldn't help but chuckle lightly at the now blonde looking hair.

"Listen, Natasha, no harm done-"

"You bleached my hair," Natasha disappeared momentarily before coming back with something hidden behind her back.

"How could you not smell it?" Jane dared to question as she came upon the scene.

"I work with chemicals for a living, don't you think I'd be smart enough to mask the smell," Tony lifted his arms up and attempted to get out that way, but Clint moved his grip to his arm, putting it in a police lock behind his back.

Natasha then stepped forward and revealed a permanent marker. Tony eyes widened almost comically and he tried to escape, but Clint tightened his grip. When Tony was finally released he rushed to find a reflective surface.

"Jarvis what does it say?" He found it hard to read.

"I believe it says 'I suck my thumb," Jarvis sounded amused.

"I do not!" Tony argued as he snatched the pen off Natasha, groaning at the label "to far Natasha, I have a meeting tomorrow,"

"So do I," Natasha retorted.

"For a multi million dollar contract? I think not," Tony began walking down the hall "you're excluded from the group surprise now!"


	13. Explosians of Every Calibre

**To the person who mentioned mince isn't an ingredient but a style of cutting, I don't know if it's an Australian thing, but mince if ground up meat. You know, pork mince, beef mince, chicken mince…..Anyway, this is the second last chapter, so get ready for the final suprise.**

**Explosions of Every Calibre **

In his room near the end of the house Steve was sketching the view from his window. It was a really great view, and looked as if it wanted to be sketched. In all the guest rooms in his house (he wondered why Tony needed so many) his view seemed the best, with the cliff face being complimented by the vast blue sky and white sand, it was just perfect.

His hand scrambled for his sharpener, eyes not going off his picture perfect view. After a second of tyring to find the sharpener he turned and frowned; he must've left it downstairs. Standing up he put down his leather bound book and began through the house towards the main lounge room. As he walked though he paced the stair case leading down to the garage.

The glass decorating the stair well though gave a mighty jump that Steve felt going up his legs, and obvious explosion. Running down stairs he found the large garage filled with smoke, and Bruce coughing to the side, tears running down his face.

The scientist seemed to notice him and the door unlocked. Pushing the glass in he walked into the room and was immediately his by the gas.

"Is that tear gas?" Steve pulled up his shirt to cover his mouth and nose, all the while looking at Bruce who seemed to be crying with a smile on his face.

"Yes," the fast majority of gas in the room began to dissipate and Steve watched Tony stand up from behind a desk, crying and laughing.

"Jarvis, recon 3," Tony ordered and instantly clean air cycled throughout the room, getting rid of the tear inducing gas. Wiping his eyes Tony seemed to fix something on his desk before turning to see Capsicle "what are you doing down here? How did he get in?"

"I let him in," Bruce said "he'd bang down the glass otherwise,"

"Right, whatever," Tony went over to a black mat like thing on the floor and stood on it "you think you can help me without setting off another bomb?"

"Why do you even have tear gas in here?" Steve wondered whatever explosive things Tony had in here.

"Riot control," Tony shrugged "Jarvis, full Mark VIII,"

Holographs began flying from all over the room, connecting onto parts of Tony's body until they formed what looked like a full suit, minus the helmet. Through the outer holographs that would make up the plates Steve could see hundreds of little wires.

"Bet they couldn't do this in the forties," Tony smirked at Steve as he walked around "Jarvis, reroute thigh booster powers to secondary arc, and add two more on each thigh,"

More holographs came flying, and Steve watched with interest and Tony did the work he actually enjoyed. Bruce was working on what looked like a tony circular ball, almost like a gold ball, seemingly not affected by all that was happening.

"Hey, Cap, make yourself useful and put on that glove for me," Tony was still fixing up the plans for his next suit.

"That one," Steve pointed at the red repulser glove that lay on the table a little away from him.

"Yeah, that one," Tony brushed off the holograms and walked forward "I need to check the kick back, but seeing as I'm not wearing a full suit you're the only one with the ability to not be flown across the room,"

"Is that Mark VIII?" Bruce questioned "you haven't calibrated the power enhancement fully yet-"

"He's here, he may as well make himself useful," Tony grabbed the glove "you don't mind do you Capsicle?"

"I'll only do it if you stop calling me Capsicle," Steve wagered.

"Rather you explode then me, you got a deal Spandex," Tony and Steve shook hands while Steve frowned at the new name.

"Right, put this on," Tony chugged a glove from his undersuit towards him and he slipped it on, followed by the glove itself. As Tony locked it into place Steve found it was bulky and odd at first, but when he twitched his fingers they felt normal.

"How can you get the metal to slide so freely?" Steve asked, watching Tony as he pulled out a length of wire and connected one length to the glove.

"Easy," Tony said, sliding the wire up in his shirt "you just need to forge the metal so that each on interlocks-"

"I don't think you should be connecting it there," Bruce commented idly from his seat "you don't know how much of a power increase it is,"

"50% actually, and by my calculations it'll hardly drain this thing," Tony let his hand fall towards the table were he picked up a little ear piece and connected it in "right, Jarvis, fire in three, two, one-"

Steve's hand grew warm and in a sudden burst of light he was thrown towards the back of the room, wire connected to Tony's arc snapping from the pull. While he landed hard on the floor some length away, Tony stumbled back a couple of steps.

"Pepper is not going to like that," Tony stared at the huge hole in the wall that seemed to go for some distance, revealing some wires "or that,"

He gazed down at his chest and saw the light flickering dangerously. Bruce seemed caught between worrying between the pair, but as he watched Steve stand up and begin to walk forward he decided to worry over Tony.

"Don't even say it," Tony pointed a finger as Bruce as he rummaged in a locked draw to pull out the long reactor. He smoothly removed his shirt to reveal the arc that was flickering blue. With a twist and pull he pulled out the long cylinder of metal and unconnected the wire.

Steve was surprised at the length of it, and a slight shift of angle let him see Tony's chest had such a huge cavity taken out of it. The man thought just raised an eyebrow at Steve.

"Done looking?" he questioned connecting the wires and twisting the arc back in.

"Doesn't it feel….weird?" He questioned stupidly.

"It hums, if that what you mean," he chucked an old palladium one at Steve who stumbled to catch it with one hand. What Tony said was true, it did vibrate "and I can feel it in my body, dancing's a pain. Anyway, Jarvis, observations,"

"It appeared the Arc was not prepared for the sudden surge, if we calibrate the repulser to warm up before shooting the loss will not cause the same problem again," Jarvis replied almost instantly and Tony nodded to himself as he began taking the glove off Steve.

"What if we decreased the power increase by twenty then cut ten from-" Tony slipped off the glove "-boosters,"

"Sounds like an excellent idea," Jarvis said.

"Bring up arc schematics while you're at it," Tony put the glove on a table "and phone Pepper,"

A ringing filled the lab as Steve sat back down and rubbed his no doubt bruised back. He supposed it was better he did it, Tony was still suffering from that cut on his back, and he wouldn't heal as quick as Steve.

"_Hey Tony, I was just about to call you" _Pepper could be heard all over the room.

Tony fiddled with the holograms before answering "you know the guys that fixed up the lab last time?"

"_You didn't_," Pepper already sounded angry.

"Maybe a little," Tony had the common sense to sound abashed "It's just some patch work,"

"_I'll schedule them for tomorrow at three_," Pepper sighed "did you break anything else I should know about?"

"I don't think so," Tony gazed around the lab.

"_Good then, I wanted to tell you its finished_," Pepper sounded excited.

"Keep it low Pepper, you're on speaker," Tony winked at Bruce.

"_It's ready when you want to use it,"_

"Goody," Tony clapped his hands together "will that be all Miss Potts?"

"_That is all, Mr Stark," _Pepper said _"Don't forget I'm back Tuesday,"_

"I need you to look at something in the tower for me," Tony said brushing away some schematics.

"_Is it in my twelve?" _Pepper asked, obviously amused.

"In my office, on my table is the tablet that needs to go to S.H.I.E.L.D," Tony tapped his fingers on the bench "I'll talk to you later,"

Hanging up Tony collapsed into a chair and massaged his chest.

"What aren't you sharing?" Bruce asked Tony, and Steve knew it had to be big if he was keeping it was his 'science bro'.

"Oh, that was Hellicarrier updates," Tony spun around in the chair.

"The other thing?" Steve asked.

"If I told you it wouldn't be a surprise," Tony smirked "right Bruce, we have a meeting to get to,"

"Why do you tell me these things at the last second?" Bruce sighed as he stood.

"I find it slightly amusing," Tony went over to the door "out Spandex, I can't trust you in here alone,"

"Hey Boss," Happy entered "Royce?"

"You know it," he patted his driver on the arm "don't forget to call Richards!"

"I won't," Happy grabbed the keys and began driving the Royce out.

"Ten minutes to get changed, go," he shooed them upstairs "I want you daisy fresh!"

Bruce had to scrub his face to get rid of the remains of the gas that was still irritating his eyes. Then he had to change completely and make himself look at least half approachable. Wasn't much he could do about the light stubble that covered his chin.

"Be back by three," Captain hollered after them.

"Yes mother!" Tony said cheekily as he climbed into the Rolls-Royce

It was a silent ride for most of the time, until Bruce dared to ask the question that was plaguing him.

"What's this for?"

"You're going to meet the deputy head of department and do some paper work. Don't worry, I got someone who's the second best in their field, next to you, and was willing to take the job." Tony looked out the window "haven't met them in person yet,"

Bruce thought about who it could be as they pulled in the heart of _Stark Industries _base. Beginning into the building he found himself heading towards the same board room as before.

"Hey, three cucumber waters, and some donuts," Tony called to a passer by who just nodded and continued on their way.

"She doesn't like me," Tony stage whispered to Bruce "I bet she gets glazed donuts,"

Rolling his eyes he followed behind Tony as he opened the door to the board room that had only one occupant. A girl with long chestnut brown hair, a soft heart shaped face, and kind intelligent eyes. She seemed a little nervous because she was playing with a necklace that rested in the hollow between her collar bone.

"Betty?" Bruce asked surprised as he moved past Tony.

"It's so good to see you again Bruce," the women rushed up and engulfed him in a hug, but then seemed to realise what she was doing and pulled away "You've changed so much,"

"You look the same as always," Bruce replied as he looked her over again "you got the necklace…."

"Of course I did-"

"Don't worry about me guys, I'm just the one that brought you two together and gave you stable well paying jobs," Tony stated dramatically as he collapsed in the head chair. Bruce glared at his friend "no, seriously, don't worry about me,"

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Mr Stark," Betty composed herself and offered a hand "I've heard much about you,"

"Not from your father I hope," Tony frowned.

"You know General Ross?"

"Old colleague, when you make weapons you tend to know everyone in the bizz," Tony shrugged and tepee his hands under his chin "you guys can do romantic catch-up later, we need to get these papers and things of out of the way or Pepper will kill me,"

"Pepper?" Betty questioned.

"His assistant/CEO/girlfriend," Bruce sat down and watched a girl come in with the food and drinks Tony requested, while three different people entered with piles of different papers and blue prints.

"I'm very grateful for the job," Betty said as Tony spread out some blue prints.

"No problem, did it more for safety reasons, can't have the Big Green Smashing Machine coming out to attack interns," Tony said without looking up.

"He's joking," Bruce reiterated for Betty who seemed to frown upon Tony's comment.

"No I wasn't," Tony snorted "have you ever had to deal with interns? Biggest pains ever. Right, these are the building schematics-" He pointed at the blueprint "-those are the list of employees and their records-" he pointed to a huge stack "-that is the budget-" and he pointed to the last stack "-and those are things we want you to look into. And papers for you to sign Ms Ross will be coming shortly."

Bruce tried to process the information while he watched Tony inhale a donut, powdered sugar getting into his trade mark moustache.

"That's me done. I have some business to look into down at the reactor, meet me there when you're done,"

"This will take hours to shift through," Bruce commented as he watched hi friend snatch up another donut and begin to leave.

"That's the point!" Tony called before shutting the door, leaving the couple in what was sure to be pure awkwardness. Whistling a merry tune he walked down to the reactor central, intent on spending all his time with Happy there talking about the latest cars to come out.

"Things have gone pretty well for you, I'm guessing," Betty commented as she looked at the work requirements "the Avengers, working with Mr Stark…."

"Yeah, it has," Bruce flicked through some papers "what about you?"

"I've just been doing work for the university, but it hasn't been the same since…" Betty trailed off.

"I know what you mean," Bruce nodded tight lipped.

"Where did you go? I tried to find you but you weren't anywhere,"

Bruce felt a wave of guilt wash over him. Maybe it hadn't been the best decision to cut off contact from the world. It wasn't that he forgot about Betty, it was just that…..hell, he couldn't even come up with a good excuse.

"I laid low for a while," Bruce commented "incidents where rarer that way,"

The awkwardness soon began draining out of the room and conversation came more freely. Bruce learned that the reason Betty was taking the job was because work at the university had slowed and funding was becoming so bad they could hardly do anything. After they finished reading everything the pair began walking towards the reactor.

"I am going to kill that bird brained bastard!" they suddenly heard Tony exclaim and Bruce smiled thinly at Betty before going to see what was wrong with Tony.

"What did Clint do now?" He questioned.

"He hot wired the Audi," Tony glared at his phone, watching the security footage "and touched Jarvis,"

"I thought no one could hack Jarvis,"

"He didn't hack him-" Tony broke off again "- I am going to kill him. You two go and have lunch or something,"

Bruce, Betty and happy followed Tony to where a sleek looking motorcycle was waiting, helmet, jacket and all. A man stood next to it, but Tony brushed him off.

"Pleasure meeting you Miss Ross-" Tony slid on the jacket and gloves"-but I have a friend to go maim,"

Chucking on the helmet he started up the bike and zoomed out of the area, heading down the coast. The bike purred underneath him but he didn't really care at the moment. After breaking numerous speed limits and road rules he made it to a secluded beach where the Audi was parked in an empty parking lot.

Placing his helmet under his arm he lifted up the bonnet and looked at the clean hotwiring Clint did. They touched his car, hot wired it, and took it to the beach. Looking down at said beach he watched Clint wave at him from down in the water. In return he flipped the bird, knowing the keen eyed Avenger would've seen it.

Pushing back on his helmet he jumped back onto the bike, speeding down the roads he made it to his mansion in record time. The gates slid open and he roared down the drive way, just missing Thor who was walking the grounds with Jane. Driving the bike into the garage he chucked his helmet onto a table and began pounding up the stairs, heading for the main lounge room.

"What are you-" Steve tried to ask, but Tony waved him off and pushed aside some piece of art Pepper had brought to reveal on of Jarvis' motherboards. He had scattered them all over the house in case of power outs, or attempted attacks. One could always back up the other. Pulling out the keyboard he quickly typed in the reboot code.

"They touched my Audi" Tony said finally.

Steve knew that the Audi was most likely Tony's favourite car, and he seemed very protective of his machines.

"And Jarvis,"

"My apologies Sir, they overrode my security feeds with a virus," Jarvis apologised

"They beat Jarvis?" Steve asked surprised.

"No one can beat Jarvis," Tony stripped off the jacket and gloves "they used a low dirty trick. Jarvis, cut off all their technological access.

"Like to see them even try to get inside the house,"


	14. The Big Surprise

**The Big Surprise **

"So, who's staying at the Tower?" Tony asked as he looked at the gathered Avengers.

It was Monday and unfortunately their break was over. Clint and Natasha had been called out for a mission on Friday and the Hellicarrier was currently over New York. Jane had left the day prior and after a very personal goodbye Happy had driven her to the airport.

"I cannot return to Asgard until the Bifrost has been completed, I have already expended the All Fathers power," Thor boomed "I will be glad to reside within your Tower of Stark,"

"I'll take that as a yes," Tony mused "Bruce I know is a yes, Cap?"

"I have my own apartment-"

"That's a shoe closet," Tony cut him off.

"-but it was getting kind of small anyway," Steve finished.

"I know you two will come along after you've finished being super spies," he looked at the assassins "okay, now into the car."

Happy had just finished loading in everyone's luggage into the limo. As Happy pulled down the drive Tony blew his house and over dramatic kiss, making the others roll their eyes. The ride to the airport was calm and surprisingly no fan girls where assaulting them.

"I tweeted we where going to the beach, they'll be heart broken," Tony commented idly as he jumped up the steps for the jet, passing the flight attendants who instantly bustled over to him, offering hot towels and drink. The others readied themselves for take off while Tony conversed shortly with the pilot.

As they reached an safe level Tony unbuckled and went straight to the bar himself, ignoring the flight attendants. Steve seem to frown, but decided not to mention anything. Thor was finding great interest in the remote, trying to make the TV work.

"Man of Iron, your TV doesn't work," Thor commented.

"Chuck it here," Tony caught the remote nimbly in his hand and frowned as he saw it "That's not the TV remote,"

"What is it for then?" Bruce asked, looking up from his books.

Steve had no idea how Tony kept a straight face as he said the next thing "stripper party,"

"Stripper party?" Clint asked surprised looking at the flight attendants "those are strippers?"

"You sound surprised, honey," a blonde attendant said as she poured him a new glass of water.

Tony passed the remote to a brunette who winked flirtatiously before going into the cockpit.

"I don't use it anymore," Tony rolled his eyes "don't look so shocked Steve,"

He picked up the TV remote for Thor, then sat down in his seat. Lounging back he stroked his beard for a moment before pulling out his tablet.

"This is my fun jet, Pepper hardly uses it," Tony commented, playing with something on the screen "any who I have a surprise for you,"

The flight attendant came out of the cockpit with a silver tray held to high for them to see. She bent over in front of Tony and picked something off it, offering to him with a flirtatious smile. He took it off her with a wink before shooing her away. She went to Bruce first who took the piece of plastic from her and looked at it. As the rest where handed around the others where left confused.

"Key cards?" Clint questioned.

"Clearance," Tony corrected "these cards let you know where you can and can't enter in any of my buildings,"

"Let me guess, this just gets us through the door?" Natasha asked.

"Only your key, and mine, can give access to your room," Tony tucked his into one of his pockets "trust me, you'll thank me later,"

"Is this part of the other surprise we can't know about?" Bruce asked with a raised eyebrow, tucking away his key card.

"Yes," Tony said simply.

The whole plane ride seemed to pass quickly and they arrived in New York at noon, a car already waiting for them. They milled outside while the luggage was being loaded in, the familiar sounds of New York assaulting their ears. Eventually though they made it into the limo, only to find they couldn't look out the windows.

"Is that glass supposed to this dark?" Steve asked as he tried to peer out.

"Yeah," Tony said without a care "part of the surprise,"

"Please don't tell me you went through with buying that shawarma place," Bruce sighed with a roll of his eyes.

"Pepper wouldn't let me," Tony pouted "so I did something better,"

"Opened your own store?" Clint offered.

"No," Tony said "you'll see in a couple of minutes,"

There was a new silence in the car, everyone was obviously waiting to see what was going to happen. Tony was spontaneous, and for all they knew he could've installed a seventy story hide water slide in his tower. Eventually though the car stopped and Tony opened the door.

"Let me introduce the Avengers Mansion,"

He stood with arms wide in front of a three story town home. It was large and expansive, the over all feel of it very different to the city outside. The group seemed to be shocked into silence, they stood and gawked with impressed looks on their faces.

"You built this for us?" Bruce asked finally, eyes roaming over the rest of the grounds.

"No," Tony let his arms drop to his side "this was my old house,"

"You grew up here?" Steve questioned, still at a loss for words.

"Yep," Tony gave a small smile "After my parents died I shifted it into the _Maria Stark Foundation_ assets, then had them donate it to us. I just fixed it up a bit. Now are we going to stand gawking, or are we going to go in?"

"The yard, doors, and windows all have numerous surveillance systems to ascertain the identities of all visitors and detainment devices to intercept unauthorized personnel. That included stimulator cannons with heat-sensitive tracking systems," Tony commented idly, slipping his key card into the door.

The foyer was large and open, expanding for a long while. It wasn't modern or sleek like Tony's other buildings, but it had an older feel about it. Steve could actually imagine someone living in this place, unlike when he first saw Tony's Malibu home.

"First floor has the dining room, kitchen (fully staffed), the library, and some living rooms," Tony stated beginning to walk towards the stairs "upstairs are sixteen bedrooms and sixteen bathrooms, one for each of you, the other eight I'll use."

They all followed him up the stairs, feeling slightly over whelmed. Tony gestured to one door and spoke to Clint "I may have had to hack into your files to find out how you liked your room,"

He pushed in his key card and opened the door to reveal a room with one wall made completely of glass, while a large king bed was situated on a raised dais, black and purple bedding included. The room was so large it actually had various different targets all over the room, along with a wall stocked with different arrows, bows and throwing knifes.

"I may not make weapons for the public anymore, but I made an exception and made some for you," Tony walked in and picked up one of the arrows "fully weighted, some explosive, others gas, some even have trackers on the end so that when you shoot someone it enters their body,"

Clint walked forward and picked up one of the bows, snapping it out. He tested the strings with a stoic face before placing it back on the hooks. He then turned to Tony who was waiting expectantly.

"So you like it?" Tony questioned.

"I love it," Clint said finally, an odd reaction from him.

"At least I got one right," Tony smiled as he left the room, stepping across the hall "this is yours, Natasha,"

The room was much like Clint's, but without the large window. Draws lined the wall and under further inspection Natasha found they where loaded with all different variations of her weapons. She walked over to the bedside table and picked up the single photo frame there, a small smile gracing her beautiful features.

"Did you hack into my files?" she asked finally.

"Possibly," Tony shrugged "now come on, we have a lot more to see,"

Next came Thors room. Tony had obviously found this one a little harder, but he still managed to make it look fantastic. Bruce's room was the most high-tech they had seen, decked out with a large TV and a nice view of the city. And apparently it was Hulk proof.

"You have no idea how much dust was covering all this stuff," Tony said as he opened the last door.

The room was medium blue and the floor was the old hard wood. It was free of any all technology except a single TV resting in the corner. On one wall where all the shield ideas Howard had showed him, along with numerous different photos. All old; him and Howard, him and Bucky, somehow even one of him and his mother.

"Wow," Steve breathed.

"You think this is cool, you should see the third floor," Tony bounced out of the room like a kid on Christmas and up the stairs, ignoring the elevator all together. Punching in a code and slipping in the key code. They had expected some kind of massive games room, certainly not an airplane hanger.

The quinjet rested within, a newly painted _A _on the side. It was attached to a landing hook. But the area was big enough to house four quinjets. The room also contained computerized navigation aids, radar, and communications systems.

"I'm guessing this wasn't in the original plans," Bruce gazed around.

"Used to be a work shop," Tony stood proud with hands on his hips "had it converted,"

"Then where's the workshop?" Clint asked.

"Down below, the sub levels span the whole city block," Tony gave a wide smile, heading towards the elevator.

"What's down there?" Steve slipped into the large elevator.

"This is the basement," Tony entered a hall "Medical area, gymnasium, Olympic sized swimming pool, simulation room, training room, and games room,"

"I like the sounds of this!" Thor boomed with a chuckle.

"Sub-level one is the briefing and conference room," they bi-passed that one and headed down to sub-level two "this is the workshop, garage, and storage area. Whatever you do, do not go into that room," he pointed a room blocked by a thick metal door.

"What's in there?" Clint questioned.

"Arsenal, nasty little bugger," Tony frowned slightly "just never go into that room,"

They headed up to the main level again and Tony lead them into one of the lounge rooms. Steve found himself surprised to see a large family painting on the wall. Howard was standing next to a brown haired beauty, who in turn had her hand on a eight year old boys shoulder.

"Pepper wouldn't let me throw it out," Tony said as he took a glass of champagne off a newly arrived serving girl "I find it a bit creepy, like it's staring at you,"

Clint took up a glass of champagne as well before saying to Tony "you're actually letting us live in your home? Knowing us we'll probably have it destroyed by the end of the week,"

"It was gathering dust," Tony shrugged, sipping from his glass "everyone take some champagne. Bruce, Steve, if you don't I will kick you out, and I'm not even joking,"

Bruce hesitantly took the glass off his friend, holding it like it would explode, while Steve took his a bit more willingly. Tony raised his glass in toast and the others followed.

"To us the Avengers: earths mightiest heroes,"

**I've always sucked at endings.**


End file.
